New Book for Bondage Lovers

I had an amazing experience interviewing Gillian Simpkins about her experience as a fetish photographer's assistant and mistress. Miss Simpkins is a very pretty girl and she has a lovely young maid, Imogene. Who likes bondage and girls in that order.

I have the feeling Mady will want Miss Simpkins and, especially, Imogene to become regular visitors.

I have no doubt elliot would be please with that arrangement as well. However, Miss Simpkins has her patron to attend to and photoshoots with lovely young models to arrange. Plus working in the used book store and keeping up her mistress glossiness.

But she seems to be doing very well.

You can see the book at Amazon. Here is a short excerpt:

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I arrived at the outer door, keyed in the code, went to the inner door, keyed in the code and shoved my worldly possessions into the studio. I looked around.

Over in the photo studio space there was a girl in a corset and stockings with her arms manacled above her head. Paul was happily taking pictures and the dark haired girl was posing as hard as she could in her restraints. What do you do?

I decided to do nothing. I pushed my boxes into the studio and walked over to where Paul was engrossed with what looked like a film camera.

“Mr. Livingston, how long have you had that poor girl chained up?” I said with what I hope was a laugh in my voice.

“About half an hour Miss. I’m Jules. I’ve worked with Paul before. This is the easy part,” said the trussed up girl. “But the money is great. Are you doing a shoot?”

“Not today,” I replied. “Paul needed a stylist. I’m it.”

Somehow it seemed perfectly normal to be chatting to a woman in a black corset, heels, and, on closer inspection, vintage stockings and shackled to a pillar in a space I was moving into. Which was because Paul was so absolutely normal. He was, matter of factly, snapping pictures.

“Miss Simpkins!” he said. “So glad you’re here. Could you just lower the left cup of Jules’ corset so I can shoot her nipple. It’s fine, I have the consent right here.”

“Totally fine Paul, and a lot more fun to have a pretty girl strip me.”

We spent the next hour making Jules increasingly naked and more than a little uncomfortable.
As I hoisted her arms behind her and pulled down her panties to reveal a luxurious 1950’s bush, Jules kept up a steady stream of conversation.

“Really Paul, you’d make much more money if you stuffed something up my pussy,” She said at one point.

“Not in it for the money Jules. In it for the style and the style says we barely see your pussy,” said Paul to my surprise. “This is all about a damsel in distress; but she mostly keeps her modesty.”
Which was somewhat true if you ignore her breasts, the nipples of which Paul had had me clip twenty minutes before. And nothing mild like the adjustable clips you see in sex shops – or I saw once – rather full on bulldog clips with her nipples pushed into the gap. This was not hardcore but it was serious. I’d attached her to a gym horse looking ready for a flogging. I was really hoping Paul would not ask me to lay on the strokes. He didn’t. A dozen close ups later and we were done.

“Miss Simpkins, set a kettle to boil and you’ll find tea in the cupboard. You did beautifully, Jules.”
I’d unstrapped Jules and brought her a robe.

“It was fun Paul,” said Jules unconsciously rubbing her clipped and swollen nipples under the robe. “It always is. And now you have an assistant.”

“I do.”

“Will she be…”

“Not today Jules. In future, perhaps,” said Paul.

“Well then, still my turn,” said Jules and she dropped to her knees in front of Paul, took his cock out of his nicely pleated wool trousers, and got to work sucking. She didn’t even take the clips off her nipples.

As I made tea, I could see her head bobbing up and down and, in a couple of minutes, just when the tea was done, so was Paul.

“Thank you, dear Jules,” he said. “Now, tea?”

“In a moment Paul, I’ll just go and rinse.”

And off she trotted to the bathroom entirely unconcerned that she’d just given her photographer a very public blow job.

I brought the tea to the coffee table where Paul had been so recently serviced.

“Really?” I said.

“Mostly,” said Paul. “I make it very worth their while.”

“Then whatever do you want me for?” I asked genuinely perplexed.

“I need to stop. I still want to shoot for my collection but I can’t afford the possibility that one of these girls is going to turn on me. Not Jules, but one of them will eventually and that will cost me a lot of money and a good deal of reputation,” he said.

The Dominant Mistress

I had a wonderful letter from Christine who lives in a medium-sized American city:

Dear Miss Jay,

What fun it is to read your blog and your books because, in a way, they are about a part of my life which I keep very discreet but enjoy immensely.

A little about me. I just turned thirty have a college degree in history and a good job at a very specialized employment agency. Very 9-5, very conservative, quite well-paid but, honestly, a little boring. I'm single by choice and, while I occasionally date, likely to stay that way for at least a few more years.

I am quite pretty. Brunette with my hair cut into a short bob. Fairly tall at 5' 7" and nicely proportioned. Which is where this discreet part of my life begins. After college, when I was working retail and trying to make ends meet, I did a little modelling. Nothing all that glamourous but the camera likes me and I am a bit of a free spirit. Once I got to know a photographer or a guy with a camera, I was more than willing to make more money doing lingerie shoots and, for even more money, semi-nude work. I was very strict about the fact that my more risque work was not for publication much less for the internet and my photographers have honored my wishes. It was a fun thing to do on a Saturday afternoon and while I didn't make a fortune, it was all in cash. It bridged the gap until I found my current job.

I had thought that I would give up modelling when I got a better paying job but I had a group of regulars and why give up a couple of thousand dollars a month so I kept going. And I began to branch out into the "fetish" world. Corsets and stockings and high black boots. I guess because I am brunette I always seemed to be cast as the "dominant" in these sort of shoots. The blonds were the girls being tied up, I was doing the tying. Which was tons of fun.

I have to admit I never really thought about any sort of dominance in a sexual sense. I knew there was such a thing but really thought it was about sadistic guys in the 50 Shades of Grey sense. But I read a bit, Gloria Brame's Different Loving was a revelation about dominance and submission and that led me to reading quite a bit online and, eventually, to your blog and elliot's first book, A Man In My Position. 

My fetish modelling gave me the chance to play a little with these ideas and I created a bit of a persona, Miss Christina complete with her own black leather corset and fetish outerwear. Some of my photographers were more than a little excited to be giving me expensive kid leather pencil skirts or long black leather gloves. One guy had a bit of a boot fetish and I had two pairs of thigh-high, black leather, high-heeled boots. Plus all sorts of props like riding crops, canes and a cute little leather paddle with a very special handle.

"Miss Christina" was much in demand of a Saturday afternoon because a lot of these photographers were, rather obviously, not so much interested in the "shot" as the fantasy. I was willing to play ball because I liked the money and I enjoyed the persona. While I was not "Miss Christina" she was certainly a part of me.

Miss Christina continued to be booked and one man, in particular, could be counted on for two or three bookings a month. Kevin, obviously not his real name, was a very nice, if timid, man in his fifties. Not bad looking and delightfully generous. He told me he loved buying me nice things and along with a few bits of fetish wear kept me in glamourous silk stockings and pretty cashmere sweaters (which he liked me to wear without a bra).

After a shoot Kevin would often take me out for dinner. Nice restaurants, no expectations. It was interesting because he really wanted to have dinner with Miss Christina but was "settling" for me. Miss Christina only existed in the photo studio. Which we talked about. A lot.

One evening, after a particularly successful shoot where Miss Christina had tied up and lightly caned that week's little blonde submissive, Kevin was very worked up.

"What if I set up a private studio for Miss Christina?" he asked.

"What for?"

"Well, I thought you might accept me as..."

"As what, Kevin?" I asked. "I know you have a lovely wife, children and, frankly, I don't see how having a studio would change that."

"Well it wouldn't," said Kevin. "But, perhaps, you could be Mistress Christina a few hours a week."

"That would be very expensive," I said hoping to kill the idea.

"Oh, that really doesn't matter," said Kevin. "My little company is doing very well."

"Let me think about it," I said. "Could the studio be a loft where I could live?"

"Sure."

"And you do know that mistresses get allowances."

"Yes, Mistress," he said.

"Not yet, you naughty little man," I said laughing. "I said I'd think about it."

"Yes, Miss."

We booked for the following weekend and I thought about it.

Not much to think about really. I would get a nice place to live and an allowance and Kevin? Well, Kevin would find Mistress Christina waiting for him a couple of times a week. I'd need to be a bit creative about which paces to put him through but I was certain I would think of something.

So off I went and I found a very nice loft which had a decent sized, out of the way, space in the back where Mistress Christina could construct her lair. After our shoot the following Saturday, I took Kevin to meet the agent and he signed a two year lease. I got the keys right there and the agent left.

I looked at Kevin.

"Strip. You are never in your street clothes in my domain," I said.

He did what he was told and was soon standing in the middle of the bare, white painted space with a very erect penis of rather modest stature.

"Oh, your poor wife. At least I don't have to pretend to enjoy that little thing. Get down on your knees, chin on the floor, arms stretched ahead of you,"  I said. "I will start as I mean to finish. Will marks be a problem at home."

"Yes Mistress, but there will be times when they won't," he said.

"Then I will try not to leave any," I said bringing the strap down on his pale white bottom. Not terribly hard but with a snap. The slap of the strap echoed off the bare walls. "I am going to need some furniture."

"And a decent allowance. You'll write a number down after your punishment and you better hope I accept it because otherwise, you are going to have a real punishment," I said bring down the strap as punctuation. "You never want a real punishment. Ever."

I want on like this until his bottom was just this side of bruising. His erection never waivered.

"Still hard I see," I said as I finished. "So write down that number."

"Yes Mistress," he said as I handed him a pencil and a piece of paper. He wrote a gratifying number as I was sure he would.

"Done, payment tonight. You can phone transfer it when I am done with you. Now jerk off onto the paper," I said. I had planned that part.

"Thank you Mistress," he said.

"Well, I want to have dinner so jerk that little cock off quickly," I said.

"Where?" said Kevin looking around for what, privacy, a tissue?

"Right here, on the paper," I said. "On your knees. Like every week from now on. Start jerking."

"But..."

"Oh, you're worried about your little mess. That's what your tongue and your mouth are for. Clean up. And, maybe, if you are very good, someday my pleasure," I said.

The power of words is amazing and Kevin shot streams of cum all over the paper and the floor.

"Lick," I said. "And don't miss a drop."

He did. Then he dressed, transferred the money, and then we went to dinner.

I teased him over dinner about his sore bottom and his humiliation on the paper. But I was also very sweet as I negotiated a clothing allowance and hair care and a few other things.

I do wish I had read your Modern Mistress before the conversation but I did pretty well.

That's how it started and, honestly, it has been pretty much the same sort of thing every week for two years. I have him come over and clean my loft in a pretty maid's uniform I had him buy from Amazon. Then a foot massage and then, if he is very lucky, he might be told to lick.

Typically, I give him some sort of physical correction and once a month, when his wife is on her period and unlikely to want his attentions, I will give him a good caning and leave welts.

We've never discussed what he wants. The very point of being a dominant mistress is that, like a dominant wife, what he wants does not matter. It is what I want that counts.

Now, you have to keep it interesting and, for three years, I have been threatening to peg him. He wants that a lot and he'll get it. The last day he is with me which is a while from now but he does not know that.

As a dominant mistress I am exclusive. I have no other submissive men. But I do like men, real men with real cocks and, once in a while, I will tie Kevin and gag him and put him in my bedroom closet when a boy fucks me hard. Something Kevin knows he will never be allowed to do. I leave the door open just a crack so Kevin can see what he will always be missing.

Kevin seems to enjoy our time together. He's renewed the lease, raised my allowances and keeps giving me pretty things. I like being spoilt.

Please keep doing your blog and your books,

Christine

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I wrote back,

Dear Christine,

Lucky you!

I really do think that every woman should spend a bit of her life being "kept" and pampered and enjoyed. But you combine that with the female dominant role that so many men crave.

Lucky Kevin!

Reading my mail there are so many men who want to submit to a lovely woman but simply cannot find her. Kevin did and, I suspect, could not be happier.

One note, never worry about his wife. You are actually doing her a huge favour. You are not about taking her man away, rather you are giving him what he craves so she can go on with her life.

It is a grand bargain and keep raising your allowance.

Enjoy!

Hannah

City Husband, Country Wife

One of the best parts of running this blog has been the correspondence I have had with other dominant wives. Every female-led relationship evolves in its own way and it is fascinating to see how other women create the blend of discipline, chastity, obedience and nurture which can bring out their submissive husband's best self.

Cara and her husband Terry have worked out a wonderful way to balance a need for discretion with a wonderful transformation. But I will let Cara tell her own story.

Dear Miss Jay,

I adore your blog and your books - not just A Man in My Position and the other dominant wife material - but also your wonderfully detailed and open minded exploration of how powerful women can maximize their potential as escorts, or, my favorite, mistresses. (The retro smut you have elliot publish I give to my Terry as a special treat.)

I suspect I was drawn to your work on the interesting nexus between sex and money because I met Terry when he was my escorting client. Though I use "escorting" in a very loose way. I had a small business catering to cross-dressers and transvestites (and if you can tell me the difference my hat is off to you, but it was very important to the men I saw.)

Believe it or not, I got into the business when I was a make-up and special effects artist. I spent my days making pretty girls prettier and, from time to time, making them scary. It was a good living and a lot of the sets I worked on paid a cash bonus. On one of these shoots a model I knew slightly asked if I could do a friend of hers make up for a party. I said sure and thought nothing of it. We arranged to meet her and her "friend" at her apartment the next day. Well, like more than a few models I knew, this girl supplemented her modelling income with pay to play encounters and her "friend" was a client who wanted to "Walk on the Wild Side". It took a little doing but I managed to create a passable impression of a woman - but he walked like a trucker. I spoke to my friend who agreed and then I suggested that, if he wanted to, I could offer him some "training" as well as the make-up and clothes. He jumped at the chance and my model friend told me later she had two other clients who wanted this sort of feminization and it was not her thing. And she had friends in the business for whom crossdressing clients were actually a problem. I was launched.

I would only see three or four clients a week, charge a high fee and make a "best efforts" attempt to let them appear and behave as women. I say best efforts because, realistically, very few men have much hope of "passing" for a woman but they seemed to have fun trying. My sessions were quite long, two hours minimum, often four.

Most of my clients were very regular and, once they had done their introductory appointments, I laid on a program of deportment, skirt management, high heels training and so on. There was no "sex" of course. However, at the end of the appointment, if they had been very good, I would tell them to go to the little girl's room and make a mess in their panties which they then had to lick clean before hand washing.

The key insight I had into these men was that they all were, to some degree, ashamed of their need to dress as women. And, here was the thing, they enjoyed the shame and humiliation of having to put on lingerie, foundation wear, wigs, breast forms, false eyelashes and so on. If I didn't tease them, demand instant obedience and tell, not ask, them to put on their "pretty" clothes they would be disappointed in the session. They wanted to be "forced". And yes, I did threaten to spank my naughty boys and, occasionally, it would be necessary as part of a session to paddle or cane a client quite severely. Of course, "quite severely" was a very relative term. The objective was to create a reason for the client to comply with his own humbling - which was the very thing he wanted.

Men! What can you do?

In my case, I charged a lot of money, built up a remarkable collection of plus sized lingerie and outfits - my clients, as part of their training, were required to purchase these items and bring them to their sessions. This all took place several years ago but even then you could get everything from side zip girdles to breast forms to plus size high heels at Amazon. You could even get the correct "gaff" panties to keep every little thing in its place.

It was all part of the ritual and the ritual was very important to my clients. For a few hours, they were going to be "forced" to be female. In a couple of years, I actually had a waiting list.

Terry was a referral from one of my model/escort friends and I saw him really as a favour. He was pretty run of the mill as clients went and I was just going through the motions as I corseted down his waist and put on the breast forms. For cross dressing, Terry was lucky. Not only did he have a gender neutral name - Terry swings both ways but he was almost hairless and was small boned if a little plump in places. The very opposite of "buff". With the corset giving his already quite tight waist a lttle shape and the "C" cup breast forms in place in a lacy black I had him slip on a pair of black satin tap panties. He was a natural blond with a rather nice full head of gently wavy hair. Rather than put him in a wig, I put in hair extensions I happened to have. Light make-up, really just a very transparent foundation, mascara and eye shadow plus a light pink lip and he was done. I clipped semi sheer compression stockings to his garter tabs. (Pro-tip, compression stockings help shape a man's leg and hide any hair which a first timer is likely to have. Plus they feel as if you are actually a naughty boy wearing stockings.)

A simple pencil skirt and sheer blouse and a pair of modest two inch heels and Teri was done. By this point I had done transformations for a fair number of men. A few, a very few, could pass after several sessions. Teri stood up and walked over to my three way mirror. He was a little awkward in his heels but, honestly, with a bit of practice, it would be very had to tell. He had delicate wrists and his Adam's apple was inconspicuous and could be made more so with a bit of reverse contouring.

"Wow," was all he said as he looked at himself in the mirror. "I never thought I would be this pretty."

He was not wrong. Unlike many men Teri suited the longer hair, the makeup, the clothes. We practised walking in heels for a little while and then I had him make and serve me a cup of tea and one for himself. It all seemed perfectly natural. As Teri he was quite feminine, funny in a slightly exaggerated girlish way and rather flirtatious. It was quite a long session and I had him change into a shorter skirt at one point. He was naturally rather modest and went behind my screen rather than showing off his lingerie. Eventually I said I had another appointment and Teri went behind the screen and undressed and came out in the lacy ruffled lilac robe I kept for clients; makeup and hair still intact.

"Come here," I said, "Open your robe."

He did as he was told and stood in front of me his little cock - and it was quite small - naked and erect. I reached out and took it in my hand.

"You enjoyed dressing up as a girl didn't you," I said gently pumping his cock.

"Yes, Miss," he said.

"And you'd like to do it again wouldn't you Terry?" I said pumping a little faster.

"Oh yes Miss."

I could feel him coming very close and I let go of his cock.

"Good. I will see you next week. Now get dressed."

He was, I suspect, a bit disappointed that I had not taken him to completion but I had other plans.

He arrived the next week and we did much the same thing. I was a bit more prepared with sizes and I had a surprise for him at the end of the session. I had him, once again, undress from his girl clothes behind the screen and came out in the peach robe I had bought him.

"Terry, when you left last week did you go home and ejaculate?" I asked holding his hard little cock firmly.

"Yes, Miss, twice that night and two or three times a day since. I can't help it," said Terry.

"I thought so," I said. "That won't do at all. Girls don't masturbate the same way as boys so we're going to have to make sure you behave. Now, here's a tissue. Jack yourself off for me."

"Yes, Miss," said Terry as he began to pull on his cock.

"Faster, I don't have all day," I said which was all it took to send plumes of sperm out of his purplish cock head. "Now, go over to that corner with my panties (I am a huge fan of corner time for men.) and hold them in the corner with your nose."

Terry did what he was told and ten minutes later I called him back. As I suspected he would be he was just as hard.

"Now, I could whip that erection away or put that naughty little cock in ice water until you get soft; but instead, jerk it again. Quickly," I said handing him a dish. "Every drop in the dish."

It took a little longer this time but in a couple of minutes there was a nice dollop of cum and several drops and strands decorating the china dish.

"You know what you have to do, Terry," I said looking at the dish. "Lick up your mess."

It was a test he passed eagerly.

"Good boy," I said reaching around for the package I had received air express.

"Now, Terry, good girls always ask for permission to masturbate. Which I know is hard for girly-bois so I have bought you a little gift. Turn around and put your hands behind your back," I said. I took a pair of handcuffs and clicked them locked. "Turn around."

Terry obeyed and I opened the box the male chastity device came in. "Do you know what this is, Terry?"

"No Miss."

"It's a cock cage. You'll be wearing it when you are not in lady's clothes," I said putting the pink silicone ring around and behind his balls. Then, using my fairly long but nicely squared fingernails, I reached under the head of his cock and pushed it into the silicone cage. He was soft enough that it was easy to get most of his cock in the cage and push the holes over the pegs. I reached through the little slot in the end and grabbed the head of his cock with my nails to pull it all into the cage. Then I slipped the padlock through the short peg and clicked it shut.

"There you go," I said. "All tucked away and I have the key. Now you can get dressed and I want you to pick me up for dinner on Thursday. Seven o'clock. Dress nicely as I am taking you somewhere special.

Two months later we were married in a civil ceremony. I wore a lovely 40's suit, seamed stocking and a pretty, veiled hat. Teri was dressed in a light linen jacket, a pair of side zippered linen trousers, cute loafers, his cock cage for lingerie and his now longer hair pulled off his face with two butterfly barrettes.

I took him back to my apartment, had him put on his nightie for bed and then gave him a good hairbrushing to set the tone of what has been a long and happy marriage. As you can imagine, having been kept in his cage for the three weeks before our wedding night, he was very anxious to perform his marital duties. I, on the other hand, thought that could wait for our honeymoon and enjoyed Teri's girlish tongue on my throbbing clit.

We were honeymooning at a small country house I owned about forty miles from the city we live in. I drove. Teri had changed into her going away outfit. Nothing elaborate, a day dress in a fine grey cotton with a little, to the waist, black jacket. Corset, girdle, bra and breast forms, hair extensions in and nice day make-up as I had instructed her to.

"In the country, Teri, you are always going to be en femme. Most weekends, two or three weeks a summer. Will you like that?" I asked when he had agreed to marry me.

"More than anything," said Terry.

"In the city you have your job so you can't really be who you like to be. Or, at least, not yet. But you'll be a country wife which will be fun for you and fun for me."

"Yes, Miss Cara," said Teri.

"After we're married you will not have to call me miss anymore," I said. "And in the country, you'll wear your pretty gaff panties rather than that nasty old cock cage."

Which was exactly what happened.

Teri has taken to the world of a 1950's housewife with a vengeance. She's always beautifully dressed, her hair is perfect and she is wonderfully obedient. She was, I must admit, a little taken aback when she discovered that I was going to give her the whole experience by having intercourse with her every Saturday night with a strap-on.

"Do I have to?" she asked?

"Of course you have to," I said. "But unlike those poor girls in the fifties with just the one cock, I have a number of dildos which will fit my harness. We'll start you off like a virgin with something small but hard and work your pretty back pussy up to big cocks."

Which is exactly what we did.

During the week, while Terry is wonderfully submissive and attentive, other than his panties and camisole and his cock cage, he is allowed to present as a slightly effeminate man. As soon as he comes home from work on Friday he showers, is let out of his cock cage, gaffed and then changes into his weekend attire.

Our neighbours in the country think we may be lesbians but we simply keep them guessing.

We've lived this way for a few years now. I am still a make-up artist and I still have a select cross dressing clientele. Terry is not in the least jealous. Even if he was, a good wife, and Teri is a very good wife, knows when to keep quiet.

Glorious Girdles

Frequent readers know that I believe that a lady is often corseted and almost never without a good firm girdle. I also believe that a girdle can be an excellent disciplinary tool when training a new husband or bringing a wayward husband to heel.

We live in an age where the corporate uniform for women is a pantsuit and women of all sizes think that yoga pants are ideal for the shops, the cinema or even, God help us, fine dining. "Comfort" has become an excuse for sloppiness. I admit to being old fashioned, I do not want to see women, fat or thin, wearing clothes which don't fit and fail to ensure modesty. At home is a whole other thing, but in public, a girl with a pretty dress and great foundations is a rare pleasure to see.

I had elliot compile a wonderful little book of nothing but girdle advertising and fashion pictures from the golden age when no respectable lady would be seen in public without a good, firm, foundation:

This weekend "Girdles Must Advertise" is free at Amazon https://amzn.to/30YTpK8

Please take a moment to download the book and, if you enjoy it, write a review.

For the submissive gentlemen who read my blog, that is not a request, it is an order...Go and get my book and write a serious, 5 star, review.

Up until the arrival of the internet, finding a good girdle in real life was difficult. Finding an actually pretty girdle that the lady of the house might want to wear was pretty much impossible. Now it is as easy as doing a search on Amazon.

I have three of these, two in black, one in white in my lingerie cabinet and, once the heat abates, look

forward to wearing them as the foundations for the dresses I prefer to wear daily. It is very helpful to have Mady doing the side zipper and hook and eye fastening as well as clipping the metal garter tabs (never get plastic) to my stockings.

Very reasonably priced and delivered discreetly to your door from Amazon. Rago High Waist Open Bottom Girdle.

Now, I am also firmly convinced that young ladies also need the support and control a good girdle can provide. Mady is in wonderful shape, has a pert little bottom and no tummy to speak of.

But when she accompanies me shopping or to church or, really, anywhere I require her to wear a suitable foundation from Labour Day until Victoria Day (we're in Canada, July 4 for my American friends). For her uniform, a simple pair of control panties are more than sufficient to give her a pleasing look. (These are, in a somewhat larger size, also an excellent option for submissive husband's daily wear.)

Under a skirt or dress I prefer something which will give her bottom a little boost and keep a smooth line for thin cotton or fine wool or cashmere dresses. I found these panty shapers when I was looking

for a pair of suitable punishment panties for elliot and while they are perfect for that function, they also make my little maid's bottom the perfect, spankable, peach the boys enjoy watching under a tight dress. I like my maid/companion to have plenty of male attention and the shape these panties give her, while leaving her sweet little bottom cheeks entirely naked, ensures that she gets it.

On the other hand, when Mady comes to church with us, I want her to be very well controlled and positively virginal. Yes, I know, completely hypocritical, but that is part of the fun. My nice church friends have no idea how elliot and I have built our female led marriage and they think Mady is a very sweet girl who is always happy to help out with the altar decorations or serving coffee after church. And she is. But she is always dressed very conservatively for church.

Which means a serious girdle but one relatively lightly constructed as traditional "roll up" girdle is very nearly perfect. It ensures that Mady's lower figure remains modestly shrouded, holds up her stockings and eliminates any hint of "jiggle". I hate the sight of women, even young women, jiggling or bulging as they sit. Pretty curves are all the prettier when they are tightly contained and controlled. A fact our mothers and grandmothers knew but which, apparently, "the comfort generation" has either forgotten or dismissed.

Having Mady wear this girdle, in either black or white with her seamed, nude or grey, fully fashioned stockings, is a lovely way to modestly show off a pretty young girl while ensuring that she is complimented by the nice ladies of the church for her modesty and good taste.

Until she came to work for me, Mady, like many of her generation had really never worn hose at all, much less stockings. Now, she really does feel naked without the whisps of nylon sliding up her milky white thighs. She tells me stockings, a nice girdle and a pair of moderate heels give her a lot of confidence. As they should. She looks wonderful.

Finally, elliot's foundations.

When we first started our journey I needed a way to confine elliot particularly in bed. He was not as well trained as he is now and we were years away from putting his cock in its cage. I looked at a variety of solutions and hit upon a good, firm, pantigirdle as both a signal and a means to enforce the fact that it was my sexual desires which mattered in our marriage.

A high waisted, long legged, side zipper girdle ensured that elliot had no access at all to his little cock. It was ideal under a pretty nightie and very much kept him in his position.

I had him add two little grommets at the top of the zipper and, when he was particularly rambunctious, I would slip a cute little padlock through the grommets and he was locked into his girdle for the night. He could still get his morning wood, something he does not like a bit in his cock cage, but there was no way he could even try to have any sort of sex with me unless I unlocked him. Perfect. And a good start towards what I now know a submissive man desperately needs, long term, locked down chastity. (During the summer, when I let elliot out of his cage, I often have Mady put his girdle out before bed just to remind him of his position.)

So, there it is, girdles for all occasions. Enjoy our free girdle book on Amazon and, ladies, whether for yourself or that naughty husband, remember a good foundation is the basis for brilliantly fitting clothes and a very obedient husband.

I love my husband and I don't want to hurt him...Is an FLR for us?

I hear all sorts of versions of this statement:

I love my husband and I don't want to hurt him...Is an FLR for us?

I love elliot. I love him so much that I am quite prepared to cane him or paddle him with my shower brush whenever he misbehaves and, occasionally simply to remind him of his position. I keep him in semi-permanent chastity and have been stretching out his ball sack with weights. I allow Mady to discipline him as well. When I am whipping elliot I know that it hurts and I know that he loves me all the more for taking the time to discipline him.

Female Led Relationships are about many things but they are rooted in the fact that a woman loves a man enough to accept and enforce his submission. Different men thrive in different circumstances but in my experience, a surprisingly large number of men are happiest when they accept and embrace their submissiveness. This is often the "missing" ingredient in a happy marriage.

I see this in otherwise vanilla marriages where it is quite clear that the wife is in charge and that her husband does what he is told. There are no explicit punishments although there may be an element of sexual reward for an obedient husband.

However, at some point, a wife may take the next step. Usually because, either covertly or overtly, her husband indicates a need for a firmer hand. 

(And here is a hint for husbands or wives who want to explore a more physically demanding FLR: simply say to your partner "If you keep doing that you are going to get a good spanking" or, from the husband's perspective, "Well I'd rather you spanked me than yelled at me." You would be surprised at how often all a woman needs to move to the next level is that sort of hint.)

Focus on that word "need". Submissive men, even those who are only slightly aware of their submissive nature, will know that some part of them is unfulfilled. They might not be able to articulate it but it's there. And it is sometimes very deeply hidden because it conflicts with a whole array of beliefs men have about manliness and masculinity. There is a lot of shame associated with male submissiveness. 

A loving wife is usually committed to meeting her husband's needs just as he should be committed to meeting hers. The realization that the man she loves deeply needs her leadership and her discipline can come as a surprise to some women; but many slightly dominant women have, at least unconsciously, been attracted to slightly submissive men since they were first dating. So it is usually not a complete shock that the man they are engaged to or married to will have a submissive streak.

In general, a man with a submissive streak is much happier and more productive when his wife or partner provides an element of discipline. This can be very subtle - simply telling rather than asking is an excellent way to begin. "Darling, I am going out. While I am gone make sure the laundry is folded and the dishes are in the dishwasher." 

Submissive men enjoy being told what to do. They also enjoy the idea that there will be consequences if they are disobedient. Which means that a loving wife, along with giving her husband instructions, will make it clear she expects to be obeyed and that disobedience will be punished. 

There are a lot of ways of punishing a husband and many wives in vanilla marriages use everything from scolding to sexual denial to simply ignoring their husbands. However, frankly, I think those sorts of tactics are actually pretty manipulative and just as likely to cause fractures in the marriage rather than any improvement in a husband's behaviour.

Much better is the explicit, "If you do not do as I tell you I'm going to have to punish you". Now, during an engagement or the early part of a marriage, the most important thing a wife can do is follow through on her promises.

Keeping a hairbrush or, better still, a shower brush handy allows a wife to administer punishment pretty much immediately.

Will it hurt? Yes, yes it will. For a spanking, much less more intense forms of punishment to actually matter, they have to hurt and your husband should not "like" being punished. Loving your husband may mean turning his bottom a rosy shade of red because he needs to feel the sting of your authority in order to actually embrace his own submissiveness.

So, if you love a submissive man you will have to, when he deserves it, punish him and make sure it hurts enough to matter. If you can do that then an FLR is very much a possibility.

How to Keep a Female Led Relationship Fresh

A question I am often asked is:

How do you keep a Female Led Relationship Fresh?

Like any marriage or relationship, over time an FLR can go from being new and edgy to a bit routine and humdrum. After all, once you have your husband trained, keep his cock in a cage, punish him as required and generally control the decision in your home, what is there left to do?

In fact, a version of this question comes up in vanilla marriages. After the first four or five months, everything from conversation to sex to chores to who takes out the trash has been pretty much resolved. (Yes, kids complicate this but they also provide a focus.)

For some couples, vanilla or FLR, that sense of a settled routine is actually rather welcome. It does make life a lot simpler. But at the cost of being less interesting, or, let's face it, actively boring. Whole books have been written about how to put the zing back into your marriage but, having scanned a few, they all seem to come down to surprises, date nights and finding shared interests. All of which are great and well worthwhile but in an FLR, a woman has a lot more scope because rather than negotiating change, she can simply make the changes she wants.

Once you have your husband trained one of the facts of his life is that he no longer has any real say in your sex life. Which takes more than a little adjusting for both the husband and the wife. At our house, for example, I don't particularly love penetrative sex even when I am on top and in total control. Which, up until Mady arrived, meant that elliot had learned to largely live without penetration and entirely without any penetrative ejaculation. Even before he was in his cock cage more or less full time, from Labour Day to the May 24th Long Weekend, he had been trained to - when told - lie on his back with his hands under his bum while I mounted him and took my pleasure from his hard little cockette. He also knew that if he ejaculated he would be seriously caned or I would take my shower brush to him. (For extra leverage I also have a longer handled shower brush which elliot is actually afraid of.) While this doesn't happen often, it is always a treat for elliot to have to stay hard but not come while I enjoy myself.

However, my real pleasure usually comes when I have elliot bobbing up and down licking my pussy. One of the things which has changed over the years is that I am much more comfortable just telling elliot to get to work when I am feeling a bit lascivious. Because he is almost always in his cage, there is no question at all of his pleasure. In fact, as he is busily using his well-trained tongue, he gets quite horney and usually painfully erect in his cage. But, here again, years of training and the frequent application of the cane if he dares to stop before I tell him to, have turned elliot into a brilliant pussy lapper. (Far too many men think it is acceptable to cease their attentions when they get tired or bored; in an FLR this never happens.)

The sheer novelty of a fully committed FLR can extend for months or even years at a time. However, it never hurts to use a little imagination. For example, if your husband has a little fetish, as I wrote below, it never hurts to tease him a little. Or reward him with your indulgence. Some men like to cross dress, others are deeply humiliated if they are required to sleep in a pretty nightie or wear a girdle under their suits. Either way, a dominant wife can use feminine clothing to remind her obedient husband of his position.

What about social life? Part of the fun of being married is making friends as a couple. A couple in an FLR will, undoubtedly, have vanilla friends who, if they notice anything at all, will note how well mannered and deferential your husband is. Which is fun in itself, especially if you know he's wearing a really frilly pair of panties under his khakis. Can you take this further?

Of course, you can. But a good deal of caution needs to be exercised by the head of your household. "Coming out" to vanilla friends, especially non-FLR couples, can be an exercise in non-comprehension and, frankly, very awkward. I've found that while many wives "get it" immediately, un-trained husbands get very uncomfortable with the idea that your husband is, formally, not the head of your household. (No doubt, younger, more "woke" men may be more open. But it is still a risk.)

To a very large degree, in my experience, if you would like to put your obedient husband through his paces, you are better off with an exclusively female audience. In fact, simply having a close girlfriend in for drinks and having your husband "serve" is an excellent introduction. Nothing needs to be explicit the first time. Your husband essentially acts as a servant bring drinks and canapes and then retreating to the kitchen until you ring your little bell.

Again, in my experience, the sheer novelty of a husband in service will usually elicit a question like, "How do you get your husband to serve drinks?" or, when you ring your bell, "He really comes when you ring?! How do you manage that?" Now the ball is in your court and you have the option of telling a little or a lot. My own strategy has always been to matter of factly say, "Well, we have what is known as a female-led marriage. elliot prefers to do as he is told at home."

Recently, this has often brought the response, "Like 50 Shades of Grey but in reverse." A dreadful book but it has mainstreamed the idea of power exchange. From there the conversation usually flows quite easily. As elliot is in earshot he hears me describe our arrangement and, when I ring for him next, my guest usually looks at him in an entirely new light. Which is great fun.

Before Mady arrived I had a couple of close girlfriends who enjoyed more than a description of elliot's submission. Once they were "in the club" I was delighted to have elliot serve in a more overt way. While I am not a big fan of the "sissy maid" look - although this "lockable" maid's uniform is quite cute - but a nice pleated skirt, white long sleeved blouse (sheer enough to show off his pretty  longline bra) and a cute white waist apron seemed to amuse my friend. So did watching elliot be sent to his corner and a few times, watching me punish elliot. And it certainly made things more interesting when I would say, "Jenny is coming over on Friday."

The variations on this sort of wonderfully ritualistic combination of cross-dressing, service and humiliation are endless.

Mady's New Project

My lovely maid/companion has finished her academic work and was looking for something to do. We chatted for a while and eventually, she said,

"Ma'am, why don't we figure out something to do with all the vintage smut you and sir have been collecting?"

If was a very good idea. While elliot and I have published several successful Amazon books of vintage material (go here if you want to take a look) we have accumulated literally hundreds of digital files plus boxes of hard copies of some of the wonderful risqué material from the late 40's, 50's and 60's. Right up until the hardcore explosion of the late 70's which doesn't interest me.

But what to do with it all? Well, Mady is saving for a trip to Europe next Spring and I thought it might be fun for her to have a chance to make a little extra money. But Amazon has tightened the rules about republishing old material. Sigh.

"What about Patreon?" said my internet savvy girl as she leafed through a particularly naughty magazine all about girls getting dressed for a date - stockings, corsets, pointy bras.

So, I've set up a Patreon account for her.

Become a Patron!

She is just putting the material up but, and this is a special treat for my readers who enjoy Mady, she is using a lovely picture elliot took of her as her banner. So you can go to https://www.patreon.com/hannah_obeyed and see my pretty maid. I think she may post a few more pictures as she works on her site.

Here is the first magazine: Mistress in Satin

https://www.patreon.com/posts/mistress-in-20986341

Right now Mady is posting a PDF version and a Zipped version. Ebook will follow shortly.

She has also posted a number of pretty pictures of herself in a nicely fitting corset...I know, I never mentioned the tattoos...we try to ignore them but I fear they are growing on me. I'd never get a tattoo but young girls do the silliest things.

Enjoy!

Pretty Maid For Summer

I have not written much about my maid Mady lately. I suspect because she is so very much part of my household that I am totally used to having her around. Whether she is exercising elliot or helping me dress or serving cocktails and dinner, Mady has become indispensable.

She is also a lot of fun and a much younger woman who I can play with in a way I can't with elliot. For one thing, she loves clothes as much as I do. Several hours a day she is, of course, in uniform; but in the summer her uniform is really very easy.

During the day I love her in this long, linen, button up the back dress. It's easy, not in the least "sexy" and can go over her swimsuit or exercise gear or a pretty little mesh corset and gorgeous lace tap panties.

Summer is all about comfort. elliot is out of his cock cage for the summer. Mady is in summer weight corsets and rarely required to wear stockings. I like her to enjoy the summer's freedom knowing that she will be in more serious service as we go into Fall and Winter.

What I especially enjoy is that she wears exactly what I tell her to wear. Which, of course, extends to continuing her waist training throughout the summer. Now, truth to tell, a full-on waist training corset which Mady wears most of the day during the rest of the year is a heavy and hot garment. Especially when it is laced down to the point where it is actually doing its job and compressing Mady's already tiny waist. But we are resolved that she will marry at 18 inches and there are still an inch and a half to go. Were she to go corsetless in the summer we would likely lose at least an inch, more likely two.

Our compromise is the lighter weight, mesh, corsets Mady normally sleeps in. Here is an example.

Unlike Mady's regular corsets these are bought, ridiculously cheaply ($15-$20) right from Amazon. I would certainly never recommend them for strict waist training - they would fall apart in a few wearings - but for retention and simple beauty they really cannot be matched. For Mady we order the XS which laces down to 20" out of the box. With a few minor alterations, we can bring a couple of them to 19.5". As it happens, the cups fit Mady's pretty little breasts almost perfectly with just a little easing.

When I feel Mady needs a bit more shaping or if we decide to give the good ladies of our little village a hint at how we maintain our figures, I will put Mady in this more heavily constructed, but still mesh, underbust corset.

It is a bit more expensive and, unfortunately, does not come in white; but it can work very well as outerwear over a dress or a skirt and top combination. Mady is more than a little of an exhibitionist so she loves letting the good ladies see the underpinnings she wears under her uniforms most of the time. The good ladies' husbands seem to enjoy Mady's tiny waist as well and, I suspect, our short shopping trips lead to all sorts of fun when our neighbours get home.

At the same time, I always have to remember that Mady is a very beautiful, very fit, young lady and, to be fair, she should have a few deliciously skimpy outfits to gain a little attention with. Nothing says "Hello" like a barely there cotton sundress with little girl flowers and no support whatsoever. You really do have to be in your early twenties to wear this dress with style. Mady does.


 Of course, in our little village and in the bigger world there are many summer events - the July 1 Canada Day Celebrations, the Annual Summer Tea at our Church, the August Regatta at the Lake and so on. When Mady was simply my maid she would not attend these events but, as my maid/companion it is elliot's and my pleasure to bring her along. But for these sorts of events I want her to be a bit elegant, a bit stylish, while still perfectly girlish.

I love Mady in a pretty polka dotted, boatneck dress with the cute little belt drawn extra tight to show

off her deliciously tiny, corseted, waist. No bra, seeing her pretty breasts running free under the thin fabric of the bodice is a treat and much appreciated by the gentlemen at these events. She knows I am showing her off and enjoys the attention. And, once again, these dresses, while well made, are ridiculously cheap. We do a little hand sewing to ensure a perfect fit but, truth to tell, I've bought Mady half a dozen of this pattern in different fabrications which lets her look different, yet the same, at each of the summer occasions.

And, yes, there is something just a little naughty about having my own, living, doll to dress just like playing Barbies. All the more fun when we all go home and I stand elliot in his corner and undress my sweet Mady and let her slip under my dress...Bliss, in fact.

12 Rules of Nature

I have been very interested in, and impressed by, Canadian clinical psychologist Jordan Peterson's recent book, 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote for Chaos. If you have not read it get over to Amazon right now and buy the book. Peterson is, however, largely attacking the symptoms of chaos rather than its causes. In fact, the causes are rooted in Nature and the denial of Nature by legions of confused, often well-meaning, egalitarians who want to pretend that there are no real differences between men and Women. This egalitarian impulse has led, directly, to the psychological chaos Peterson so intelligently outlines and prescribes against.

So, slightly tongue in cheek, but also with a very real point to make, here are my own 12 Rules of Nature.

1. Men and Women are fundamentally different. Mentally, emotionally, physically we are not the same and the idea of equality between the sexes is a basic and dangerous illusion.

2. Women are primary in the construction of any sort of civilized world. From this Primacy flows virtually all of the social, cultural, sexual and political norms of a well-ordered world.

3. Women are sexual creatures but their sexual triggers are more subtle and more complex than the rude and primitive sexuality of men. Part of civility is bringing men's base urges under the control of whichever woman is in charge of them at the time: mother, mistress, wife.

4. Civilization and civil society arise when men accept that women are in charge of the sexual world and that their male urges and fetishes and needs are best met in subordination to the requirements of an intelligent, aware, woman.

5. Men have no right to sexual expression. Part of the process of maturation for men is to have their sexual lives channelled and controlled from puberty onward. It is a mark of a civilized society that men are only allowed a sexual outlet inside the bounds of matrimony or in the context of a paid relationship with a willing and dominant mistress or courtesan. Outside those two situations, a man has not earned the right to any form of sexual gratification and should be shamed if he, as it were, takes matters into his own hands. Within those situations, however, a man's sexual release remains a privilege to be earned. In a properly understood marriage, the husband is chaste unless and until his wife will enjoy his attentions. Not every husband has his cock in a cage, but many do and it is a growing phenomenon. And more than a few professional mistresses have chastity requirements for their clients.

6. Because of her Primacy in Nature, a woman should be given choices. The decision whether or not to work outside the home should be a choice and, generally, a woman will find it more rewarding to be supported by the work of a man. Prior to marriage, a young lady often enjoys the support of a patron. In both cases, women have the perfect right to demand and receive complete and generous support. In fact, in a proper marriage, a man will tend to turn over all of his earning to his wife and be put on a weekly allowance.

7. When a woman is ready to be supported she may initially opt to provide companionship to a variety of men in exchange for that support but, in the longer run, she will almost always want the stability of a marriage to the best male she can attract.

8. It is entirely Natural for a woman to be hypergamous. Hypergamy is most easily thought of as "marrying up". But that is a very shallow version. A better version is that women naturally want to spend time with and, eventually, marry men who will be good providers, faithful, good fathers and the best men they can be. "Rich" or "good-looking" are passing conditions, but dumb is forever. Women are looking for two very important male traits: intelligence and submission.

9. Standing up Straight, Cleaning Your Room and a number of other items mentioned in Peterson's book are the minimum requirements a woman should have for a man she is considering either spending time with pre-maritally in a paid role, or marrying. The last thing a woman wants or needs is a weak, ineffectual, emotionally challenged little boy dressed up in a suit. And, in fact, the suit may be a social marker which is less important than being a man of real skill in a torn t-shirt.

10. In a civilized world where the Natural order is observed, women will expect, as of right, good manners, deference and a respectful attitude from every man they meet. They will also conduct themselves according to certain basic rules - for example, a single or married woman will never find herself alone with a man who is not either her husband or client. And, yes, this does limit dating quite a bit. Which is alright because, unless there is a professional relationship, a woman will tend to impose the strictest chastity on any prospective spouse from the first date onwards. She will want to see how obedient he is and what level of control he can manage over his baser urges before even considering marriage.

11. As part of her Primacy, a woman will make the effort to be as attractive as she can be. Women are not all supermodels, but good skin care, a reasonable diet, exercise and an attention to clothes and makeup will go a long way towards ensuring that a woman's Primacy is unmistakable. Dressing in a feminine and understated way, avoiding excess, and enjoying the pleasure of being the object of the male gaze are all part of a woman accepting and revelling in her Primacy.

12. In Nature, in a civilized and civil society, women are in charge. A woman should take her natural place at the centre of attention. In situations where her Primacy is not acknowledged, a woman always has the option of leaving, or, perhaps more to the point, of calling a man to order. A woman receives the Primacy she demands.

Sexual Economics

I received a note from a long time reader about some of the books I have written:

---
Dear Miss Jay,

Along with your wonderful books on Female Led Marriage, and I especially like Obedient Husband: Female Led Marriage for Loving Couples, I noticed that you have written a number of books on what I can only think of as "sex for sale". In particular, you have written two "guides" for women.

The first, Avails: Escorting for the Elegant Woman is, simply speaking, a guide book for women who decide to charge money for their sexual favours. I have to call that prostitution which, besides being illegal, seems contrary to your message of female superiority and empowerment.

The second, MODERN MISTRESS: LEAD THE LUXURY LIFE YOU DESERVE seems to suggest doing at a wholesale level what your earlier book is about at the retail level.

How can you square this sordid exchange of money for sex with your views on the best way to organize a marriage or relationship? I completely agree with you that men are often happier when they do what they are told, are kept in chastity and punished for even the slightest infraction; but I cannot see how an intelligent, dominant, woman could countenance the female exploitation implicit in escorting or mistresshood. Can you enlighten me?

Respectfully,

Amelia

---
Dear Amelia,

While I see your point I have to disagree: strong, elegant women can exercise their power over men in a variety of ways. Having and training a submissive husband or boyfriend is, in many cases, the ideal end state for a woman to achieve life long happiness but what of those delightful years when a girl is in her twenties and thirties and has little interest in "settling down"?

Many women are just finding their dominant side when they are younger and, frankly, many women are more than a little frightened of the power they actually have. After all, while society talks a good game about female empowerment, the #METOO scandals suggest that the old ways have not gone away. Unfortunately, young women with well developed sexual identities often find themselves devalued by the various, more powerful, men they encounter. In many cases this leads them to retreat into either the conventionally asexual world of the "alt-girl" or the anti-sex world of "pantsuit nation". In both cases, and in all the other asexual or anti-sexual approaches to the world, a young woman is denying what is, in fact, a huge element of her power. While this is always a woman's choice, I think it is important that young women - as well as more experienced women - keep in mind some sexier, more powerful alternatives.

A good deal of the impetus for writing the books were conversations I had with my maid Mady. The poor girl had, before we joined us, been so confused by her sexuality that she had retreated into a lipstick version of college lesbianism. All very pleasant I'm sure, and it did give her certain skills for which I am personally very grateful, but she was, as her continued use of elliot's little cock suggests, a flaming heterosexual. However, she was deeply intimidated by the "anything goes" hook-up culture she encountered in college with boys her own age and had no idea what to do about it.

For many young women "sugar" culture has become an answer. However, in my view, sugaring simply leaves girls in a subservient position while being required to "service" their so called "sugar daddies". Where a mistress dictates the terms of her engagement and expects her patron to honour them, a sugarbaby is in constant danger of replacement. And much of that has to do with the sorts of men who are involved in sugaring. Not to be snobby about it, but sugar daddies tend to be wealthy but not gentlemen.

The quality of the men involved in either a mistress relationship or at the upper end of the escorting world make all the difference. Which I write about at length in both my books. For a young girl starting out or an elegant woman testing the waters, the objective is to find a gentleman or several gentlemen who are prepared to pay a significant sum for the pleasure of her company. (And I note in these #METOO times, for the professional discretion a mistress or an escort offers.)

For a younger woman a patron can also be a mentor and, in the right circumstances, a huge help in her career.

Yes, there is a sexual component obviously. However, a good deal of Avails and Modern Mistress are about the settings, the lingerie, the candles and the music. Of course there are sections on really good oral technique, managing role play and creating the magic of erotic tension; but a successful escort or mistress is about much more than sex.

As you know I believe that most alpha males, and alphas are far more likely to be gentlemen than their weaker, less confident, inferiors, have an often repressed submissive streak. Being taken in hand by a woman twenty or thirty years their junior can be a huge turn on. And, in fact, what a patron or client is usually looking for is a break from their high stress, decision a minute, intense world where they are totally responsible. Having a standing date with a mistress or enjoying an evening with an escort takes them away from the pressure.

Reading my books, a woman will learn a lot about how men are managed, how patrons are relaxed and pampered and how clients become regulars. And it all comes down to a woman using the power of the feminine for her own ends.

Both books have a lot of interviews in them. Girls and women I spent several hours with talking about how they arrange their encounters, how they dress, the mood they try to create. But in almost every case, the key to their success (and these are very successful women) is that they establish that they are in charge right from the moment the client or the patron walks through the door.

My books are, in fact, about another aspect of feminine power. No successful mistress or escort allows herself to be exploited. Quite the opposite. In a kind, giving way, she offers her patron or her client the opportunity to meet her needs as she defines them. While she might begin by catering to her clients' or patron perceived desires, he will soon discover that his encounter is much more satisfying when he does what he's told and is "rewarded".

Very much like a male's place in a female led relationship.

-----

	You can buy Modern Mistress at this link. If you have Amazon Prime you can read Modern Mistress free.
	You can buy Avails: Escorting for the Elegant Woman at this link.
	If you are looking for sexier stories of mistresses and escorts (you naughty boy!) you can buy Money Sex: tales from the luxury lives of high end escorts, mistresses and courtesans here. It is one of Mady's favorite pillow books.

Needs and Wants: My Handmaiden

I find myself in the interesting position of being the head of household for both my husband elliot and my handmaid/companion Mady.

And, yes, Mady has been "promoted" although that is not quite the right word for it. Back in May I related my conversation with Mady who wanted to take her position and her submission to a very different level. Over the summer, as we enjoyed the heat and had elliot pulling us around the property in our dogcart, naked except for his cute little chastity cage and his shiny stainless steel ball stretcher. We went to the beach often and Mady enjoyed swimming in a pretty, retro, modest and deliciously sexy one piece or a wonderfully demure two-piece I had bought her.

We talked a lot. Where elliot and I have been working on our wife marriage for years, to the point where we barely think about it: he does what he is told and is soundly whipped if he doesn't, no need to over think that. But with Mady there is a different dynamic and we needed to figure out what would work for her and for me. (elliot was not part of these conversations, when we had figured it out we told him.)

More than anything Mady wanted and needs security. A very clear idea of being taken care of, of someone making decisions on her behalf and in her interests. There is a lot of information out on the web about Mistresses and slaves and, unfortunately, Mady had read a lot of it. It eventually emerged that she had thought that her next step would be to become my slave because that seemed to her to be the only way to be sure.

As my readers know, I do not believe in slavery in any form. Particularly inside a household. I understand that some wives prefer their husbands to be their slaves but I think that creates a fiction which can be very harmful. In a wife led marriage a husband needs to be obedient and accept his wife's position as head of the house. He needs to accept the fact he will be disciplined and, in most cases, will have his sexuality either curtailed or entirely subject to his wife's needs and desires. He will almost certainly be chaste. But none of that amounts to slavery because no intelligent woman wants or needs a man who does only what he is told to do. Rather, an intelligent woman will want her husband to accept her complete authority and then go forth and do mighty things. (And, it turns out, that a man in that position tends to put a great deal of effort out into the world knowing he is loved and protected at home.)

This is even more true with a young woman who is looking for the direction and discipline only an older woman can bring. Having Mady as a slave, however voluntary that condition, would waste all of the interesting things my maid was capable of. More importantly, it would actually reduce her usefulness to me. Between her really exquisite lady's maid skills, her lovely service at cocktail hour, her delicious teasing of poor elliot, her occasional intimate service, and her genuinely lovely demeanour and beauty, I couldn't see how I could improve upon her situation as my maid. But I had to or risk losing Mady to a larger world. But I didn't want to lose her, now automatic, curtsies which always made her nipples harden under her transparent blouses, displayed so beautifully in her quarter cup bras.

As we talked over the summer I realized that Mady very much enjoyed the mistress and maid situation. She loved the fact that when she was on formal duty I required her to corset her waist tightly and, except in summer, wear lovely, sheer, seamed, stockings (a dozen pairs of which will be in her Christmas stocking. Ho, ho, ho.) For formal entertaining, while she does not wear a sheer blouse she does have to wear five inch black patent leather pumps black patent leather pumps which she has been practising in since she came to us. She likes the fact she is required to whip elliot into shape and she has done a wonderful job. No sign of a belly on my darling husband after eight months of carrying Mady on his shoulders and pulling her little dog cart. And she told me she loved all of this. But it was not quite enough.

Because there was all the time she was off duty. On her own. Writing her book, reading, relaxing, "It is so hard to go from being on duty as your maid to my space where I am just me. elliot is never on duty and he is never off duty, he is just your submissive, obedient husband all the time." said Mady in one of our talks at the beach. "I'm your maid all of four or five hours a day, the rest of the time, I really could be anywhere. Drifting."

You can see the problem. On duty, Mady has a role and a set of responsibilities. She demonstrates her position with her dress, her corset, her curtsy and her acceptance of my orders. Off duty? Her identity as my maid is lost and she is left to her own devices. For a girl who craves order, who needs routine, discipline and a sense of place being left to her own devices is a penance she should not have to bear.

I thought about it. I knew I did not want a "daughter of the house". Incest, even play incest, makes my flesh crawl so that was out. Besides, I did not want to lose my maid. Mady was already my bondswoman with a full indenture and an oath before God. And that was not enough. Taking her to my bed, and sending elliot off to his lonely single bed in his dressing room, was fun for an evening but not really a solution. She needed to know she had a place in my household when she was not performing her domestic duties or keeping my husband trim and sexually frustrated.

The more I looked at the problem the less tractable it became. The fact was that Mady really did want to be mine in the same way that elliot is and she wanted to remain my maid. As with so many things in life the Bible offered a rather good concept which I eventually came across: a handmaiden. Technically, a handmaiden was a female slave who served a mistress but was often given to the husband to "wife". Not quite how our household works, but the sexual element of the handmaiden's duties seems to fit. While I didn't much like the "slavery" element, the idea of a handmaiden can also be looked at in status terms where I, as the Lady of the House, have the social standing of a wife and member of a community, whereas my handmaiden's status is entirely within my gift.

The beauty of this solution is that the Biblical handmaidens, Hagar, Zilpah and Bilhah, were all given by their mistresses to their mistress's husbands to "wife". Now, leaving aside Miss Atwood's distopian tale, the fact is that taking Mady as my handmaiden as well as my maid would mean she would be giving me formal control over her breeding - whether I choose to have elliot cover her (unlikely) or find a suitable, I suspect older, man whom she might marry - which seemed to appeal to her.

So we sat in the shade by the beach after Mady had done her lengths and had a soft white towel around her pretty shoulders. I was sitting in a canvass director's chair elliot had carried down to the beach along with our picnic, umbrella and blanket in his dog cart.

"I have made my decision Mady." I said quite formally. "We will change your vows. You will become my handmaiden at home, when we travel or are away from the village, you will be my companion. You will still, of course, remain in service as my maid, but your duties will be extended. When you have completed your own book you will write a book for me. Instead of being able to choose your own clothing when you are off duty you will dress as a young lady of this house. You will attend me unless and until dismissed. You will also be bred when I decide who will be fathering your children. Which will not be for a few years. Which brings me to a rather strict requirement which you will have to accept as my handmaiden."

"Yes ma'am." said Mady looking up at me.

"As my handmaiden you will no longer have vaginal, penetrative sex. Of any sort." I said having thought about this for some time. "You will, of course, be used anally and orally on the rare occasions elliot is allowed to be frisky; but we will be saving your pussy until I decide to breed you."

"Yes ma'am." said Mady.

"So, before you take your vows I will have your labia pierced and rings inserted. I would think four or five rings on either side should be sufficient. When you have healed, which I am told will take a couple of months, my jeweller will have finished a pretty white gold chain and a diamond set padlock. We will lock you up after your vows."

"Oh yes ma'am. Thank you ma'am." said Mady gasping a little.

"And while the piercer is working we'll have your clit hood done as well. Normally I will leave that free of your chastity. I want you unpenetrated rather than unpleasured. And I know elliot is very skilled."

"He is ma'am. Very." said Mady.

"Well there is no harm in him practicing on my handmaiden is there." I said. "Especially if she is wearing her pretty rings and lock."

"No ma'am, no harm at all. Actually, I think practice makes perfect and he is getting pretty close to perfect."

"He is, but I am sure we can make him even better."

We left it at that. Mady was smiling the quiet smile of a woman who knew her place.

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If you are thinking of taking control of your marriage or asking your wife to put you in your place, you may want to read a few of our books or buy a cock cage or ball stretching weights:

	You can order a cock cage for your husband or yourself at Amazon. I recomend starting with a relatively inexpensive silicone cage for fit and obedience training. Order here.
	You can order ball stretcher for your husband or yourself at Amazon. I recommend starting with a fairly light stretcher. Make sure you measure the ball sack circumference. You want the stretcher to fit snugly just above the testicles. Order here.
Books you might like:
The Art of the Maid Mady's Favourite Book
Dominant Woman  Feminine Superiority in Art
Obedient Husband Effortless Female Superiority in a Loving Marriage
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