Thursday 31 October 2019

Wifedom Books, Mistresses, Escorts, Smut and More

As many of you know, elliot and I have published a number of books. Over the years it has grown into quite a substantial

You can find elliot's collection here https://amzn.to/2wIiej4.

My, much smaller collection including a femdom novel fragment and several books about mistresses and escorts can be found here: https://amzn.to/2IlVDOU.

A great way to access all our books is to sign up for a free 30 Prime trial. You get all our books and many more female led marriage, lingerie and beauty books for no cost:
https://amzn.to/2WtF1bE


While I keep trying to finish my own guide to female led relationships, here are a few guides I have found helpful. They are not quite elliot's and my relationship, but they are interesting and cover some of the essentials:

dominant wife

The Dominant Wife Rulebook


This is an interesting approach for couples who want the wife to lead but are not quite sure how to make that happen. 

It really is a list of suggested rules the husband has to obey along with punishments for infractions.

I would describe this as a beginner's book and it is very popular. 

You can buy it here or try Prime for Free










Femdom for Nice Girls: A Self-Guided Manual for the Caring Mistress


This manual is much more my cup of tea. 

It is nicely written and takes on the question of how a "nice girl" can also lead her relationship, discipline her man and have a wonderful time doing it.

Most importantly, it assumes that its reader is very hesitant about assuming the dominant role in her relationship. So, if you are a wife who has been asked to explore taking charge or if you are a husband who wants a way to ask his wife to become the head of household this is an excellent place to start.

You can order it here or try Prime for Free

Locked-In Love: How two weeks in chastity can end the barter system, renew courtship and make a better husband


A lovely book about the positive effects of enforced male chastity.

There is no question at all that a man in a chastity device is more attentive, obedient and, in time, grateful. This book is about one couple's exploration of male chastity.

Nicely written from the male perspective, this is a story of how a marriage was transformed from a "barter system" where the husband constantly tried to manipulate his wife into a more pleasant, and I would say, correct situation simply by locking up the husband's cock.

You can order it here try Prime for Free 

Sunday 20 October 2019

Outsourcing

Yesterday's post about a Dominant Mistress sparked a wonderful letter from Nancy who writes from a small city in the South Eastern United States,

----
Dear Miss Jay,

A few years ago my husband Kyle confessed to me that he would like me to take the leadership of our marriage. It was quite an adjustment and reading your blog and elliot's books about your female led relationship has been very helpful.

It was not easy but it seemed to make him happy. I keep him chaste and in a chastity device most of the time. I prefer the metal to the silicone but have both. But the fact is that I was and am very uncomfortable other elements of female-led marriage, especially disciplining Kyle. And he certain needs and, frankly, craves discipline.

I took your advice and got a long-handled wooden shower brush which I have used occasionally. But it was obvious that I just couldn't really swing it hard enough. I mean I could, but I love Kyle too much to seriously cause him the sort of pain he seemed to need. And there were other things he wanted which I just can't imagine. Being pegged was one thing and taking an enema was another and, well, he kept begging me to pee on him. I know it took a lot of courage just to ask but I just couldn't do any of that sort of thing. It all left us both very frustrated.

Of course, in my little city, while I have lots of friends, we are all gracious southern ladies who really don't speak about bedroom matters. I kept trying to do what Kyle needed but I just couldn't. Finally, not knowing where to turn, I mentioned I was having problems with Kyle to my doctor. She is much more worldly than I am and asked a few questions and then said, "I think I may have a solution. Leave it with me for a few days."

A few days later my phone rang and a rather pretty voice said, "Mrs. x, my name is Fiona. I'm a nurse and Dr. y suggested I might be of assistance with your husband. I thought we might meet and discuss what you need and what your husband requires."

We quickly agreed to meet for tea at one of the nicer hotels in town and the next day I dressed carefully and had a little notebook in my handbag. Fiona had asked me to make a list of what I would want for Kyle and what Kyle needed. I had that list.

Fiona had told me she was quite petite and had jet black hair. The lovely girl who was wearing a pleated white, calf-length dress and a clever, muted pink tweed Chanel jacket who sat down across from me had not said she was beautiful. But she was. She held out her hand.

"I'm Fiona, Nancy," she said. "Let's order tea and we'll figure out how I might help."

We had a wonderful, funny, conversation. She was, in fact, a nurse but she only worked three nights a week at one of our hospitals on the acute care ward.

"The rest of my time is my own," she said. "Which means I am able to accommodate situations such as yours. You would be surprised at how many of the nice ladies we are taking tea with have these sorts of problems."

Fiona ran her "practice" from a lovely little cottage - she had pictures on her phone - on an estate just outside town. "It's very private and a little isolated. And I have all the facilities you need for this sort of work. Did you make your list?"

I handed it to her.

"Very straightforward," she said. "I am happy to be Kyle's disciplinarian and the other items on the list will simply be worked in as needed. Will he be ejaculating?"

I was very reassured by her very professional tone. "I don't think so unless you think it would be helpful."

"Quite the opposite, ma'am. Is he in chastity?"

"Usually."

"Well always send him locked to me and the question will not come up. Although, as you indicated that pegging was on the agenda, he will certainly have an intromission as that is how I tell when a pegging is complete."

We sipped our tea and went into some detail about Kyle's submissive fantasies. Fiona was very funny but also very professional.

"Men are remarkably silly. I think because, unlike women, they never really have to grow up," she said. "Which suits me as it provides a delightful cash income without the slightest risk. And most of my clients are, in fact, wives who know what their husbands want but who are simply not willing to provide it. I am more than willing."

"Do you want me to do maintenance?" she asked.

"Maintenance?" I asked right back.

"Yes, some female led couples find that a good spanking or caning once a week reminds a man of his position. I have three clients whose husbands I see weekly," she said.

"I'll have to think about that. Do you think it works?" I asked.

"Very much depends on the husband," said Fiona. "It sounds to me as if your husband is pretty obedient right now. I'd suggest leaving maintenance alone for the moment. You can always change your mind. And, once you are comfortable with the fact that I will be doing the serious corrections, you might do maintenance yourself."

"That's a thought," I said thinking about my shower brush.

"Now, when I am disciplining a husband I usually wear a wonderfully old fashioned nurse's uniform. With the cap and the pinned on watch. I have several. It keeps the interaction clinical and professional," said Fiona. "It also means that a wife can easily say, "You are going to see Nurse if you keep that up" and the husband will know exactly what to expect."

Fiona was expensive, "I prefer to be on a monthly retainer against which I will charge for the time spent and carry the balance forward. There are no "extras" and I take the time required for a full and thorough correction. You can send Kyle as often as needed. The only thing I need is a note from you indicating the level of correction, from 1-5, required. 1 is pretty mild. In Kyle's case likely a paddling and an enema. At 3 there will be marks and possibly some bruising. A 5 is pretty severe and you should reserve it for occasions where he really needs punishment."

Fiona finished her tea. I gave her an envelope with her first month's fee in cash. She stood up and held out her hand. "This will be the last time I meet you. Your husband is in good hands," she said. "After each appointment, when your husband is doing his corner time, I will fill out a short report which he will take home to you."

Now, I have gone on far too long but, the next week, Kyle was more than a little rude to me and I looked him straight in the eye and said, "That's enough. You are going to see Nurse." Of course he had no idea what I was talking about but I sent Fiona a text and set an appointment for that evening. As she requested, I wrote a short note explaining the nature of the offence and wrote a number, 2, if memory serves.

I called Kyle into my sewing room. "Kyle, deliver this note to the lady who lives at this address and do exactly what you are told. Your appointment is at eight. Shower first."

He looked pretty worried but obeyed and was soon off to meet Nurse.

Two hours later he was home.

"Strip," I said wanting to inspect Fiona's work. Silently Kyle took off his clothes. "Corner."

As he walked to his corner I looked at his perfectly welted bottom. Then I opened Fiona's report.

It was succinct. "Caning, 24 medium strokes with light cane;  enema, 2 quarts, 10 minute retention, some cramping; small anal plug, one hour after golden shower in dog cage. Husband responsive to commands, well trained. Kyle accepted his correction and does not plan to be rude again. I explained my service and told Kyle that I was acting as your proxy to provide necessary and strict discipline. signed Nurse Fiona.

"OK Kyle, you can go and put your robe on," I said. "Then come back and tell me all about your visit with Nurse."

"Yes, ma'am."

I fetched some wine and lighted a couple of candles on our coffee table. Kyle came in and I motioned him over to the couch.

"So, how did you like Nurse Fiona?" I asked.

"Wow. Where did you find her?" replied Kyle.

"Through a friend," I said.

"Darling," said Kyle getting on his knees. "First off I have to apologize for being rude. And I have to thank you for making the effort to find someone to correct me."

"Well don't do it again. Now get up and tell," I said.

Kyle sat back down on the couch, a bit gingerly.

"Okay, but I am still sort of processing it all. I had a hard time finding Nurse's cottage but, eventually, I found the turn off and drove down a narrow country road for a quarter mile until I saw a nice little bungalow with its outside lights on. I parked, got out the car and knocked on the wide wood door. I heard heels clicking and the door opened and there was Nurse. She's tiny and in full nurse's uniform. I handed her your note.

"Stay here," she said. She closed the door with me outside while she read it. The door re-opened and she said into a phone which was recording, "I am Nurse Fiona. Your wife has sent you here for correction and punishment. When you step across my threshold you have agreed to do exactly as you are told and accept whatever corrections, punishments or orders I give. Your wife requires that you do as I tell you. Do you agree?"

"Yes, Nurse," I said.

"Then, come in," said Nurse putting down her phone. "Follow me."

She led me to a set of stairs which obviously went to the basement. "Down."

I noticed that she had a water bottle and was wearing what looked like a 1940's nurse's uniform.

"Undress."

I did as I was told.

"What a nice chastity cage. Your wife had very good taste. Now go and kneel on that bench."

I went over to a very simple bench which was well padded and had restraints for my wrists and ankles as well as a belt which went around my thighs and another which held my waist very securely. Nurse said nothing as she buckled me in and tightened the belts. I was immobilized. When she was done Nurse sat on a stool directly in front of me.

"Now Kyle, your wife has sent you to be punished for your rudeness. She has indicated in her note that you are to have a level 2 punishment out of a possible 5 levels. Open your mouth."

I did and a thick, penis shaped gag, was put in place. I heard the click of a padlock.

"Now a little ginger," said Nurse moving behind me. I felt something push into my backdoor.

"Ginger root works differently with different people. We'll leave it to get started for ten minutes and then you'll get your caning. If you clench your bottom the sting will intensify. After your caning and one or two more punishments, you'll be getting an enema which will, I suspect, reduce the sting before we put in your bottom plug," said Nurse. Then I heard her go back upstairs and I could hear her television come on.

The ginger began to sting. Not unbearable but irritating. The minutes went by slowly and the sting increased. And if I squirmed I would get a dose of ginger juice which upped the discomfort. By the time I heard Nurse's heels clicking down the stairs it was really becoming difficult. I was sweating.

"Enjoying your little fig aren't you Kyle," she said. "It will get a lot more intense as I whip you. A level two caning is 24 strokes. It is a simple system. Level 1 is 12, 2 is 24, 3 is 48 and so on. But I am using a relatively light cane today. If this was level 3 I would use a medium weight cane and at level 5 I use a heavy cane. For nearly 200 strokes. You'll want to avoid that."

Without a moment's warning I could hear the cane whistle through the air and crack on my bottom.

"At level 2 I do not cross my strokes, but at level 3 I switch sides and your bottom looks like a nasty tic tac toe board. I really would not clench my bottom in your position, the ginger will hurt more than the cane," said Nurse. "And last longer. Only a few more to go."

"Darling, please, never go past level 2," said Kyle. "I was crying after a dozen strokes and Nurse didn't care. I would have been screaming but the gag silenced me. And I couldn't help clenching my bottom so the ginger was leaking agony in my bottom."

Nurse was relentless. I swear she timed the strokes so that every ten seconds a new wave of pain hit. But I was counting the strokes and, at last, we'd hit twenty four.

"As this is your first time you will only have six bonus strokes. Normally there are at least a dozen. And they are always cross hatched," said Nurse switching sides. "I have a little less control with my backhand so this might pinch."

Pinch! Dear Lord. Each stroke connected to at least five of my original welts which actually cut the skin a little. I know because Nurse cleaned me up afterwards. The ginger was excruciating. But nothing compared to the cane. Or so I thought.

"There you go, done. I'll just leave you there for ten minutes to let you catch your breath. You did very well but, well, you don't have much choice do you," said Nurse. I could hear her heels going back upstairs. Now the ginger was competing with my blazing bottom's agony. I honestly hoped I'd pass out but no chance of that and, truth to tell, the endorphins had clicked in and while everything hurt I was well past caring. I closed my eyes and embraced the pain knowing it was for you.

Nurse came back.

"We'll just put on this blindfold and then we can give you a nice shower," said Nurse. "I have always wanted a rotatable bench so my naughty boys could look up but, well, they can't look because I am not that sort of girl, so this does fine."

I began to feel the warmness of her pee as she soaked my head and then my arms and shoulders. It was almost hot. I couldn't see a thing but I could smell her pussy scent and the urine as it hit me. It went on for a long time and I realized why there was a drain in the floor. Finally, Nurse was done and I had had my first Golden Shower. The ginger was agonizing and I was praying that Nurse would finally pop it out. No go.

"We'll just let you enjoy that for a little while," said Nurse. And I heard her going back up stairs.

Nancy, I cannot tell you how much the ginger stung. It was like having a million hornets up my bum. She just left me there. I could hear the TV and the show was, at last, ending. But she didn't come back down. I don't really know how long I was there until, finally, I heard her coming back. I felt her pull the ginger out of my ass but that was no relief.

"So Kyle, I expect you will never be rude to your wife again," said Nurse.

I couldn't respond other than nodding as the gag was still in.

"Time to clean out that nasty ginger juice," said Nurse putting on a pair of gloves. "Two quarts of nice, warm soapy water up your bottom and all the way into your colon will help a lot."

I felt her push some sort of lubricant in and then a quite thick thing which went in a long way. It hurt but not nearly as much as the ginger. Then a gush of warmth and the stinging died away. I began to feel full and then she attached a second bag and I began to feel cramps. Small at first but they increased in intensity.

"You'll cramp a bit, just relax. You only have to hold this for ten minutes," said Nurse.

Those were ten long minutes during which Nurse undid all but my wrist restraints and put something on my bottom.

"Your wife will be pleased. You'll have welts for a week," said Nurse.

The cramping was getting worse and I desperately needed to get to a washroom. Nurse looked at her watch.

"OK, keep holding. I will release your wrists and then you will be able to go to the washroom. I'll be waiting."

Relief. Darling, I totally understand why you never gave me an enema. But it felt so good to release. Amazing really. I came out of the washroom to see Nurse standing beside a dog cage with a fairly large butt plug in her gloved hands.

"We'll just slip this in and lock you up in your cage for a while so you can think about how grateful you are to Nancy for arranging all this. When I come back I will let you out, you will get dressed and come upstairs. I will take out your gag and you, without saying a word, will go home to your loving wife and the head of your household," said Nurse.

About half an hour in the dog cage later that is exactly what happened.

"Thank you Darling," said my dear husband.

"You've learned your lesson?" I asked.

"Oh yes."

"And that what you've wanted me to do?" I asked, curious.

"I don't know.  I can't imagine you being that intense."

"But that is what you have needed, isn't it?"

"Yes, ma'am," said my darling husband.

"Then that is what you'll have. Now go and shower and go to bed. I'll be up in a little while."

Which is how we started with Nurse Fiona. I make sure her retainer is paid up to date and Kyle is sent over a couple of times a month if he is naughty. Which he often is. We've never gone beyond level 2 and I suspect we never will. But Kyle never knows what is in the envelope. But he does know that Nurse Fiona will follow my instructions to the letter.

I just have to say "Three" for a complete attitude change.

It's perfect.

Yours,

Nancy

-----

I wrote back,

Dear Nancy,

Thank you so much for sharing this.

Ginger is a nasty thing and darling elliot has been figged more than occasionally.

Nurse Fiona sounds like a treasure and how clever of your doctor to find a solution.

For some women, the very idea of punishing their husbands, no matter how much their husbands want to be corrected, is impossible. Outsourcing is a great idea.

The difficulty is finding a woman like Nurse Fiona. They are out there but all too often wives turn to professional dominatrixs who don't quite "get it". Nurse Fiona obviously does and both you and Kyle are very, very lucky to have found her.

Enjoy!

Hannah








Saturday 19 October 2019

The Dominant Mistress

I had a wonderful letter from Christine who lives in a medium-sized American city:

Dear Miss Jay,

What fun it is to read your blog and your books because, in a way, they are about a part of my life which I keep very discreet but enjoy immensely.

A little about me. I just turned thirty have a college degree in history and a good job at a very specialized employment agency. Very 9-5, very conservative, quite well-paid but, honestly, a little boring. I'm single by choice and, while I occasionally date, likely to stay that way for at least a few more years.

I am quite pretty. Brunette with my hair cut into a short bob. Fairly tall at 5' 7" and nicely proportioned. Which is where this discreet part of my life begins. After college, when I was working retail and trying to make ends meet, I did a little modelling. Nothing all that glamourous but the camera likes me and I am a bit of a free spirit. Once I got to know a photographer or a guy with a camera, I was more than willing to make more money doing lingerie shoots and, for even more money, semi-nude work. I was very strict about the fact that my more risque work was not for publication much less for the internet and my photographers have honored my wishes. It was a fun thing to do on a Saturday afternoon and while I didn't make a fortune, it was all in cash. It bridged the gap until I found my current job.

I had thought that I would give up modelling when I got a better paying job but I had a group of regulars and why give up a couple of thousand dollars a month so I kept going. And I began to branch out into the "fetish" world. Corsets and stockings and high black boots. I guess because I am brunette I always seemed to be cast as the "dominant" in these sort of shoots. The blonds were the girls being tied up, I was doing the tying. Which was tons of fun.

I have to admit I never really thought about any sort of dominance in a sexual sense. I knew there was such a thing but really thought it was about sadistic guys in the 50 Shades of Grey sense. But I read a bit, Gloria Brame's Different Loving was a revelation about dominance and submission and that led me to reading quite a bit online and, eventually, to your blog and elliot's first book, A Man In My Position

My fetish modelling gave me the chance to play a little with these ideas and I created a bit of a persona, Miss Christina complete with her own black leather corset and fetish outerwear. Some of my photographers were more than a little excited to be giving me expensive kid leather pencil skirts or long black leather gloves. One guy had a bit of a boot fetish and I had two pairs of thigh-high, black leather, high-heeled boots. Plus all sorts of props like riding crops, canes and a cute little leather paddle with a very special handle.

"Miss Christina" was much in demand of a Saturday afternoon because a lot of these photographers were, rather obviously, not so much interested in the "shot" as the fantasy. I was willing to play ball because I liked the money and I enjoyed the persona. While I was not "Miss Christina" she was certainly a part of me.

Miss Christina continued to be booked and one man, in particular, could be counted on for two or three bookings a month. Kevin, obviously not his real name, was a very nice, if timid, man in his fifties. Not bad looking and delightfully generous. He told me he loved buying me nice things and along with a few bits of fetish wear kept me in glamourous silk stockings and pretty cashmere sweaters (which he liked me to wear without a bra).

After a shoot Kevin would often take me out for dinner. Nice restaurants, no expectations. It was interesting because he really wanted to have dinner with Miss Christina but was "settling" for me. Miss Christina only existed in the photo studio. Which we talked about. A lot.

One evening, after a particularly successful shoot where Miss Christina had tied up and lightly caned that week's little blonde submissive, Kevin was very worked up.

"What if I set up a private studio for Miss Christina?" he asked.

"What for?"

"Well, I thought you might accept me as..."

"As what, Kevin?" I asked. "I know you have a lovely wife, children and, frankly, I don't see how having a studio would change that."

"Well it wouldn't," said Kevin. "But, perhaps, you could be Mistress Christina a few hours a week."

"That would be very expensive," I said hoping to kill the idea.

"Oh, that really doesn't matter," said Kevin. "My little company is doing very well."

"Let me think about it," I said. "Could the studio be a loft where I could live?"

"Sure."

"And you do know that mistresses get allowances."

"Yes, Mistress," he said.

"Not yet, you naughty little man," I said laughing. "I said I'd think about it."

"Yes, Miss."

We booked for the following weekend and I thought about it.

Not much to think about really. I would get a nice place to live and an allowance and Kevin? Well, Kevin would find Mistress Christina waiting for him a couple of times a week. I'd need to be a bit creative about which paces to put him through but I was certain I would think of something.

So off I went and I found a very nice loft which had a decent sized, out of the way, space in the back where Mistress Christina could construct her lair. After our shoot the following Saturday, I took Kevin to meet the agent and he signed a two year lease. I got the keys right there and the agent left.

I looked at Kevin.

"Strip. You are never in your street clothes in my domain," I said.

He did what he was told and was soon standing in the middle of the bare, white painted space with a very erect penis of rather modest stature.

"Oh, your poor wife. At least I don't have to pretend to enjoy that little thing. Get down on your knees, chin on the floor, arms stretched ahead of you,"  I said. "I will start as I mean to finish. Will marks be a problem at home."

"Yes Mistress, but there will be times when they won't," he said.

"Then I will try not to leave any," I said bringing the strap down on his pale white bottom. Not terribly hard but with a snap. The slap of the strap echoed off the bare walls. "I am going to need some furniture."

"And a decent allowance. You'll write a number down after your punishment and you better hope I accept it because otherwise, you are going to have a real punishment," I said bring down the strap as punctuation. "You never want a real punishment. Ever."

I want on like this until his bottom was just this side of bruising. His erection never waivered.

"Still hard I see," I said as I finished. "So write down that number."

"Yes Mistress," he said as I handed him a pencil and a piece of paper. He wrote a gratifying number as I was sure he would.

"Done, payment tonight. You can phone transfer it when I am done with you. Now jerk off onto the paper," I said. I had planned that part.

"Thank you Mistress," he said.

"Well, I want to have dinner so jerk that little cock off quickly," I said.

"Where?" said Kevin looking around for what, privacy, a tissue?

"Right here, on the paper," I said. "On your knees. Like every week from now on. Start jerking."

"But..."

"Oh, you're worried about your little mess. That's what your tongue and your mouth are for. Clean up. And, maybe, if you are very good, someday my pleasure," I said.

The power of words is amazing and Kevin shot streams of cum all over the paper and the floor.

"Lick," I said. "And don't miss a drop."

He did. Then he dressed, transferred the money, and then we went to dinner.

I teased him over dinner about his sore bottom and his humiliation on the paper. But I was also very sweet as I negotiated a clothing allowance and hair care and a few other things.

I do wish I had read your Modern Mistress before the conversation but I did pretty well.

That's how it started and, honestly, it has been pretty much the same sort of thing every week for two years. I have him come over and clean my loft in a pretty maid's uniform I had him buy from Amazon. Then a foot massage and then, if he is very lucky, he might be told to lick.

Typically, I give him some sort of physical correction and once a month, when his wife is on her period and unlikely to want his attentions, I will give him a good caning and leave welts.

We've never discussed what he wants. The very point of being a dominant mistress is that, like a dominant wife, what he wants does not matter. It is what I want that counts.

Now, you have to keep it interesting and, for three years, I have been threatening to peg him. He wants that a lot and he'll get it. The last day he is with me which is a while from now but he does not know that.

As a dominant mistress I am exclusive. I have no other submissive men. But I do like men, real men with real cocks and, once in a while, I will tie Kevin and gag him and put him in my bedroom closet when a boy fucks me hard. Something Kevin knows he will never be allowed to do. I leave the door open just a crack so Kevin can see what he will always be missing.

Kevin seems to enjoy our time together. He's renewed the lease, raised my allowances and keeps giving me pretty things. I like being spoilt.

Please keep doing your blog and your books,

Christine

----

I wrote back,

Dear Christine,

Lucky you!

I really do think that every woman should spend a bit of her life being "kept" and pampered and enjoyed. But you combine that with the female dominant role that so many men crave.

Lucky Kevin!

Reading my mail there are so many men who want to submit to a lovely woman but simply cannot find her. Kevin did and, I suspect, could not be happier.

One note, never worry about his wife. You are actually doing her a huge favour. You are not about taking her man away, rather you are giving him what he craves so she can go on with her life.

It is a grand bargain and keep raising your allowance.

Enjoy!

Hannah


Saturday 5 October 2019

Time Outs


shackles optional
Some dominant wives want servile, timid husbands who are entirely submissive all the time. Which is fine but, honestly, for me that would be pretty boring. I want elliot to be the smart, sassy man I married. Of course, I also want his instant obedience and his love and respect; but I married an alpha male and I have no intention of giving up the wonderful masculine traits that entails.

Keeping his cock in a cage is an assertion of my authority and the fact there is only one sexuality in our marriage, mine. His discipline, his physical training, his submission to both myself and my maid/companion Mady, his periodic confinement in his little room, are all designed to shape his character, not change it.

Which means, of course, that from time to time, my sweet elliot gets a little rambunctious. Very much the nature of the beast and I wouldn't have it any other way.

That said, there are lines he knows he cannot cross. One of them is backchat. He does not always remember this. There are other minor annoyances which, while they must be corrected, don't always call for the cane or shower brush. In fact, I would argue that dominant wives are wise to keep physical correction as a measured response for serious misbehaviour.

In my house, elliot (and sometimes, when she is naughty, Mady) know that minor infractions lead directly to a time out. Just a few minutes in a corner or locked in a closet. Corner time is a very effective "call to order" and can be imposed, literally anywhere. (Mady was a bit cheeky in a ladies shop the other day and I sent her into the changing room to stand in the corner. As she was going in she was going to close the door, "No, Mady, leave the door open." Part of corner time is the humiliation.)

Being locked in a convenient closet is a terrific "time out". Effectively, elliot is banished for a few minutes or even, an hour or two. For a man with an active mind and lots going on, the sheer boredom of standing or sitting in the dark is a very real punishment. So much so that he has actually asked me to cane him rather than giving him a closet time out. No luck with that request and it always adds fifteen minutes to his closet time.

Creative corrections ensure that elliot and Mady remember their places without losing the feistiness which makes my house such fun.


Thursday 3 October 2019

Locktober

elliot has been in chastity since Labour Day and is all the better and more attentive for it. I have allowed him one ejaculation and Mady tells me she has had him out twice to enjoy a little penetration. Of course he knows he is never to ejaculate when Mady is using him and he also knows that if he does he'll be whipped severely and locked down in his "meditation" room for several days. He's very careful. So, at our house "Locktober" is not really all that big a deal.

Other marriages have different routines and I was delighted to get this letter from a dominant wife in Oregon a few days ago.

----

Dear Miss Jay,

I love reading your blog. You have such a wonderful, matter of fact, way of leading your marriage.

My husband, roy, accepted my leadership in our marriage a couple of years after we were first married five years ago. For the most part that has involved roy doing what he is told and accepting the fact that if he is disobedient or talks back he is in for a paddling. I have a light 14 inch bamboo paddle for quick corrections, a cute 8 inch hairbrush which I keep in my bag and am happy to use if roy gets stroppy when we're out and, on your recommendation, a 17 3/4 inch wooden shower brush which roy hates and I use only sparingly. Just having the shower brush in the shower reminds roy not to masturbate without my permission.

Rather like you, I am not especially fond of penetrative sex. I would much rather have roy pay me oral attention and I have trained him to pleasure me and then accept the fact it is my choice as to whether or not he will be allowed to pleasure himself. Which is fine but in the last year I have wanted a bit more control and I have been putting roy in a chastity device. This has been an occasional thing until the last couple of months where I have been leaving him locked up for a few days at a time.

He has responded very well to fairly short periods of chastity - yes, it really is true that a man in chastity will do almost anything to be released - but now I would like to extend those periods.

My thought was that "Locktober" might be a good test run for roy's chastity to become his default position. Rather like elliot. So, I am going to lock him in on October 1 and, no matter how much he begs, I am not letting him out until Halloween.

My thought is that I will do a weekly clean up with a face cloth with roy's hands handcuffed behind his back. I was also thinking that, around the 15th, I might masturbate him to relive the pressure.

What do you think of my plans?

Yours sincerely,

Cecily

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I wrote back.

Dear Cecily,

What a lucky man roy is to have found an intelligent woman to obey. Good for you.

I think your plan to lock roy up for thirty-one days is excellent. Extended chastity changes the whole dynamic in a female-led relationship. I know the shower brush impresses the seriousness of your dominion on roy's posterior but having his cock locked up for a month will add a whole new dimension to your marriage.

So I think, overall, your plans for Locktober are nearly perfect. Two quibbles, first, you write about locking roy up but you don't mention upping his oral service requirements. Locktober is not just about going cock free for a month, it is also about the lady of the house enjoying lavish oral sex, massages, foot baths and all sorts of other delightful things a chaste male will be only too happy to do.

My second quibble is more serious. A man in chastity should, in my view, be chaste for the duration of the time you set. If you are locking him up for October he should not come at all in October. Strict, I know, but for long term chastity to have its desired effect, orgasm denial needs to be part of it.

Now, if you really think you need to "relieve the pressure" (and I note there is no proper medical evidence that prolonged chastity is harmful), might I suggest, mid-month, that you push a vibrator up his bum and let his prostate cause him to dribble without any hint of orgasm. (I wrote a short book on the benefits of prostate milking in female led relationship: A Ladies Guide to Prostate Milking.) A good remote control anal vibrator and you can pretty much handcuff him, lie him on the bed, push the vibe up his backdoor and flick the vibe to a medium setting. Twenty minutes later he'd be drained but, in this is the key thing, he will not lose the edge you have been building. Men who orgasm undergo physio and psychological changes and it takes them sometime to rebuild the sexual tension which keeps them so attentive. Prostate milking avoids that altogether.

So, enjoy Locktober! I know roy will. And, remember, if Locktober goes well, there is always NOvember.

Enjoy!

Hannah