Wife in Charge

I have had several emails and social media messages from both men and women asking how elliot and I have come to our female led marriage. elliot has written a bit about it at his blog, here and here and that is a good start.

From my own perspective I am not naturally dominant in the sense of wanting to boss people around. Instead, I like to have people, particularly my husband, work very hard to please me. Which is not, I must say, all that difficult to do.

At the same time, very early on in our marriage I made it clear to elliot that, at least in the bedroom, I was in charge. Too many women put up with mediocre sex too often. I was more experienced than my lovely alpha man and I knew he needed training. So, I began by cutting him off entirely after about six months. No sex for a month focuses a man's attention. Then I began our current regime where he is allowed to have sex when I want the greater pleasure his little cock can sometimes bring.

What this did was put him on my sexual cycle. The only time he had any hope of ejaculating was when I was on heat. The rest of the time, while I would have him pleasure me with his tongue and fingers from time to time, his cockette was entirely irrelevant. (Caging him has only underscored my control.) A man allowed to ejaculate only a few times a year is a very attentive man.

It was a natural progression to both punishing him and whipping him to remind him of his place and he learned to accept his whippings as a near substitute for the sexual satisfaction he was denied. He actually gets quite broody when he's not been whipped for a week. Over a year, while he might ejaculate a dozen times, he'll be whipped at least forty. Whipping makes a huge improvement in elliot's attitude and puts a bounce in his step.

Humiliations like corner time, his little black cock cage and having to wear a girdle during the day or a nightie to bed, simply re-enforce the fact that I am in complete charge in our marriage. Special attention like nipple clips or having to push his steel rod up his backdoor add a bit of surprise to the mix.

The wonderful thing about a wife led marriage is that elliot is completely focused on me and what I require. And, of course, I pay strict attention to elliot. At the most basic level after years of marriage, we each are devoted to each other. The femdom element and the fact elliot is chaste means that we both live on a bit of sexual edge which many of our contemporaries' marriages seem to have lost.

When a wife is in charge of her marriage she has no choice but to pay close attention to her own desires while ruthlessly curbing her husband's. More than once I have whipped elliot simply because he was getting all hot and bothered and I was not in the mood. A well whipped man standing in his corner with his nose pressed in your panties is actually a pretty sexy sight and, I have to admit, I have occasionally whipped elliot just so I could take myself in hand for my own pleasure as he stood so obediently. Which is, of course, my perfect right and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Must be Strict #femdom

One of the more interesting difficulties in a female led relationship is that, eventually, your husband is very well trained indeed. He does as he is told without question almost all the time. He accepts his chastity and understands that only your sexual needs matter in your marriage. He cleans the bathroom, puts away the dishes, rinses your lingerie without being told to.

Of course, once in a while, he might be a little moody or slightly disobedient; but not often. While there is much to be said for maintenance whippings and daily naked corner time for him to remember his place, the fact is that unless you make new demands he will, slowly, cease to be on his toes. You don't want that and, just as importantly, neither does your husband. Men do best when they have goals.

I very much enjoy having elliot get up, turn on the heat, put on my tea kettle and take my yesterdays' panties to his corner. It is especially cute now that his little cock is in his soft black silicone cage so he can't play with it. It also gives me a chance to give him his instructions for the day.

I very much enjoy having him build our Amazon books - the series of 1950's Mens Magazine Covers - is actually going to be an archive which I'll use for some of my retro outfits. And I love how our last bout of exercise and nearly full time girdling slimmed elliot down. So, from now until Christmas he's to make a magazine a day and do exercises twice a day before and after he puts on his daily wear girdle. I'm a little on heat at the moment which is an excellent time for elliot to be very much locked up. He can lick very effectively while his little cock is straining in its short cage.

Being a dominant wife is all about focus. Which, fortunately, I have.

#FemDom Free Book for Black Friday

Shopping Madness! Before you buy enjoy our first book A Man In My Position Free!
And then, when you have downloaded that book carry on shopping at Amazon. I have a few items to pick up for elliot's training:

• this rather elegant dressage whip,
• this metal chastity cage for punishment,
• and this rather large looking bottom plug for, as she put it, "mindfulness in your corner"

And I would like to buy this smokey eye shadow palette, this lipstick, these pretty control top panties and these gorgeous seamed stockings.

So, like everyone else on the internet we ask you to consider doing your shopping at Amazon through one of our links...maybe this one to get your free copy of A Man in My Position

Much better

It is really true that a man locked in chastity is a lot more attentive and obedient. In fact, elliot is positively looking for ways to please me.

I have been a bit distracted recently but this morning I was in the mood for a lovely submissive husband bringing me tea in bed, cleaning up the kitchen, spending time with a nice moist pair of my panties in his corner and then pleasuring me until I was ready to have a glorious orgasm.

I've taken to having him retreat to his corner when I am close. I love watching him push his nose in my panties and, if not for his cock cage, get harder and harder as he hears me coming to the edge and falling over. So that is exactly what happened.

After I had throughly enjoyed his very skillful tongue - he just gets better at licking and sucking my pussy, not to mention sliding a couple of very clean fingers right into me - off he went in his adorable little cage. It didn't take me long to come and when I had I lay back and sipped my tea.

"You can get into position now." He knelt on the bed and I took my time bringing my medium rattan cane down hard against his ass. I wanted welts and I got them. When I was done I sent him back downstairs to freshen my tea. He was very grateful.

That's better

I have been experimenting with elliot's cock cage. We have established that he can be caged pretty much full time for as long as I want. The question has been how long that actually is.

elliot is two things: first, chaste unless I permit him to come. Second, nipple trained - basically, unless I am pinching his nipples quite hard, even if he is erect and thrusting he is not allowed to come. Which means that his cage is not keeping him chaste, it is doing something else.

At one level having his sweet little cock in its cage is just another way of reminding elliot of his position. He has no sexual rights in our marriage and that is just the way we both like it. But the cage also isolates his cock. While he is never allowed to touch his cock without asking permission there are moments where he gains a certain amount of stimulation from rubbing, or wearing his girdle or even just against the sheets. With his cock in its soft cage that stimulation is gone.

I prefer to be the sole source of elliot's pleasure or frustration. The cock cage enforces that situation. When I came home from shopping and elliot handed me the key he knew he was going to stay locked in until I let him out. I suspect he also was acutely aware of the fact he has not been allowed to come for nearly three weeks. All the while taking his micro doses of Viagra.

His behaviour has been far from perfect so locking him up will need to be accompanied by a good caning or two...But first it's time to give him something to make his little cock uncomfortably hard, I am going to have him lace up my corset for cocktails. Maybe I'll whip him as well. We'll see.

Playing with Twitter

I have been having fun playing on Twitter.

It is a silly place but there are some wonderfully erotic images posted.

It is also a great place to post our Kindle Books and my Pins at Pinterest.

I've set up a feed to your right.... Enjoy!

Not One Thing It's Another

What a silly week or two. Lots to write about but just as elliot was about to write our wonderfully remote power went out.

Well, there are many things you can do by candle light. Many. Especially with a delightful, obedient husband who has his little penis locked in a soft cage. No danger of mess with my pleasure and elliot is growing quite resigned to the fact he is pretty much going to be wearing his cage full time.

He did beg briefly as I had not let him out on Halloween as he thought I night. A quick caning and half an hour en femme in his corner reminded him that it is always my choice and it is vulgar to plead.

He's been delightfully docile since and contentedly making Kincle books which makes him hard. His cage makes that uncomfortable but not impossible.

I told him to put up a couple of free books and here they are:

We had great fun shooting some of the pictures in this book. I styled the lovely young and remarkably well build young lady and elliot, under my direction, had fun shooting them.

Half way through the shoot it was quite obvious that he was enjoying himself a little too much so I asked the girl if she had a nice wooden hairbrush, took elliot to her bedroom, shut the door and spanked him until his little cock settled down. I fear out model quite enjoyed the noise and was all the sexier for the remainder of the shoot. You can get the book free here.

This is the first of our Spic and Span series of reprints of the famous 1950's early 60's British magazine. Nothing but pretty, amateur girls who know they are naughty showing off their stockings, gorgeous petti coats, knickers and bras. This is the first of six of these collections.

You can get Spic and Span #1 free here.