Can a FLR save my marriage?

Another question which comes to me a lot is:

Can a FLR save my marriage?

Wouldn't that be great. Just put the wife in charge of the marriage and all will be well. Unfortunately, it is a bit of wishful thinking.

What a FLR can do and do very well is ensure that a marriage will not need saving. When you look at the common causes of marriages breaking down they tend to be, in no particular order, money, sex, unpleasant personal habits and infidelity. To which I will add the self-silencing of wives. More on that below.

As you might expect, if you put your husband in a good, sturdy, cock cage (and I am going to try this one with the cute little electric shock feature for elliot's next chastity device) the infidelity issue tend to disappear. Practically, it is more than a little difficult to persuade Gillian from HR to have a quickie if the required equipment is under lock and key. However, far more importantly, a good cock cage deadens the sensations which keep men on high alert for sexual opportunity. Plus, the fact a man has given his wife control of his "little brain" means that the slight discomfort the chastity device causes occasionally is a reminder of his submission.

Keeping a man chaste also goes a long way to addressing the "sex issue". In vanilla marriages, sex is an issue because of the differing libidos and desires of the partners. Many men seem to feel entitled to sex of some sort when and where they want it. Other men are unwilling to please their wives orally or will insist on ejaculating or pressuring their wives to pretend to enjoy "porn star" penetration. In an FLR, there is only one sexuality in the marriage: the wife's. And, of course, there can also be the issue of a husband's lack of desire. Especially as men get older they can lose interest.

I believe that the cornerstone of a female led relationship is the woman's total control over her husband or boyfriend's sexuality. A cock cage is best but even absent a cage, a man needs to understand that his sexual desires are to conform to his wife's needs. Period. If you don't want to cage your male then the next best thing is to punish, quite strictly, any suggestive language or uncalled for erections. A good long handled wooden bathbrush sitting innocently in the shower can be employed quickly and effectively. The words "hit the shower" will take on new meaning when your husband knows he will be spanked until his erection goes away with a few extra strokes as a reminder. In fact, the firm application of the bathbrush over a few weeks will have him begging for a cock cage.

The longer a man is denied any release the more frustrated and anxious to please he becomes. elliot was just back from a trip last night and, for fun, this morning I had him spend a happy half hour using his clever tongue. Then I sent him to his corner with a pair of perfectly juicy panties. I came, he got as hard as his cage would let him. I was delightfully satisfied. He was deeply grateful to have been allowed to lick me.

The sex issue is not an issue; it is a matter of a woman taking charge of her own sexual enjoyment and, frankly, rationing very strictly her husbands orgasms - if she lets him have any at all they have to be earned.

Which leads to the third and fourth issues. Properly disciplined a submissive husband will never have any odious habits. He'll be showed and shaved on the schedule you set. He will ask permission before having a beer or a glass of wine. He will stay at the weight you decide is best for him and exercise to ensure he avoids the dreaded Dad bod. A dominant wife with a fat husband is a contradiction in terms. Most women enjoy being enfolded in good, strong arms. In this day and age, that means working out. Not too hard, but regularly. Part of his training is to keep himself desirable for you even if you rarely allow him the pleasure of sex. He needs to know that you are proud of him, see him as your arm candy with all that implies.

As to money, in an FLR, the wife sets goals and expects those goals to be met. The money your husband earns should be automatically deposited to an account which only you control. Of course it makes sense for him to have a small allowance and a credit card for emergencies. But every week, when he comes to you for his allowance it is very important that he account for every penny. (I like to have elliot either naked or in a pretty bum baring girdle when he makes his financial report. Sometimes I invite Mady.) If you, as the Lady of the House, control the money there will be no arguments.

I use much the same method to set realistic goals on a quarterly basis. How much he needs to earn, how much to be saved or invested (in my name of course) and how much we will have to spend. These are important decisions and in an FLR they are my decisions. And of course, with the goal setting meeting comes either a reward - usually an ejaculation, sometimes a little more - or a punishment. A good cane can ensure better results next quarter. I keep a suede handled rattan cane by the fireplace in elliot's office for these performance reviews. It is a little heavier than my normal cane and elliot hates underperforming.

Last but not least, self silence. Biting your tongue. Putting up with things to keep the marriage going. The number of women I meet at church or at parties who will tell me about this or that character flaw in their husbands but will never tell their husbands is staggering. I am often tempted to carry an inexpensive wooden hairbrush in my bag and simply hand it to the poor things and say, "This will change everything." And it will.

In an FLR the wife has the last word. When she says, "Not another word." she can back it up with anything from a brief timeout in his corner to a full scale whipping with multiple instruments with her husband tied down. A well trained, well-disciplined husband learns to listen, carefully, to whatever his wife says. He learns to do exactly what he is told and to do nice things without being asked. It takes a while, but with a firm focus, any wife or girlfriend can train her man to first obey and then, as his life improves, surrender.

The time to save your marriage is long before it needs saving.