Wednesday, 19 April 2017

Male Focus

I have always been amazed at the change in elliot first when he accepted his position as my submissive husband and, later, when I placed him in semi-permanent chastity.

The elliot I loved and married had more than a few blemishes. While he was a successful businessman and involved in our community, until he accepted my leadership in our marriage, he tended to be a bit scattered. Like most men, elliot was easily distracted by his own, rich, fantasy life. A pretty girl would walk by or he would see something on the internet and he'd lose focus.

Like most men, elliot really could not get enough sex. He would constantly pester me for "a quick blow job" or "a quickie". And it got worse the more successful he became. The problem was that my delightful husband was an alpha male with all of the sense of sexual entitlement alpha's usually have. At the same time, his alpha sexuality did not seem to actually satisfy him. And it certainly didn't satisfy me.

When I first took the lead, one of the key things which I decided was that there would be only one sexuality in our marriage: mine. Now this might sound selfish, but it was actually very pragmatic. A properly submissive husband needs to focus his sexual energy on the one person he is allowed to lust after. But he also has to recognize that, unlike men, women are not always thinking about or eager for sex or, for that matter, sexual talk or suggestions. I know that I have a cycle of sexual interest and there are only a few days in a month where I am interested in any sort of sexual activity. Prior to taking the lead in our marriage, I would feel some obligation to accommodate elliot's sexual desires even in off and shoulder parts of my cycle. A big deal would be "celebrated" with a romp in bed and a household task completed might be rewarded with a blow job. Which was fun for elliot but once the novelty of our wedding wore off, was a chore for me.

By first restricting and later more or less eliminating elliot's ability to request, much less demand, sexual attention, I was able to assert my own authority and ensure that my needs and desires were the only sexuality in our marriage. Now the focus was on me and, it turned out, that actually took a substantial burden off elliot's shoulders.

Being a gentleman of a certain age, elliot grew up assuming that a strong male would set the sexual pace for his marriage. Worse, he assumed that I expected him to be "ready to go" pretty much all the time. After all, his male sexuality was not supposed to have cycles. In actual fact, his sexuality was actually cyclical and subject to all the ups and downs a successful man's stress levels produce. Without firm boundaries and a good deal of discipline, the divergence between his actual sexual appetite and what he thought was expected of him just added to his stress. Taking charge of our sexuality as a dominant wife took that stress and re-oriented it. He's told me, often, how relieved he is not to have to posture as a sexually rampant alpha male and how content he is to give me my pleasure when I want it without any thought of reciprocation.

Locking up his little cock in its cock cage simply formalized his complete sexual submission. The fact he has not ejaculated except when I have Mady prostate milk him for about two months is his new normal.

Which is not to say that elliot is not regularly teased by Mady's perky little nipples under her sheer uniform or required to give me extended oral attention before being sent to his corner while I come in private. And the micro-doses of Viagra ensure he fills his cage with his helpless little cock often. But his, more or less permanent chastity means he has shifted his focus to what he knows will please me. Under Mady's strict supervision he is in the best shape he's been in a decade. His business is booming letting us live very well indeed. We are still very active in our community although I have taken the lead there. With the surrender of his manhood, elliot is free to do what he does best - business and pleasing me. He could not be happier or more fulfilled and our marriage and our lives move forward easily and with delight. Now that elliot's sexuality has been reduced to longing and oral service, he understands and embraces his position.

As he should.


If you are thinking of taking control of your marriage or asking your wife to put you in your place, you may want to read a few of our books or buy a cock cage or ball stretching weights:

You can order a cock cage for your husband or yourself at Amazon. I recomend starting with a relatively inexpensive silicone cage for fit and obedience training. Order here.

You can order ball stretcher for your husband or yourself at Amazon. I recommend starting with a fairly light stretcher. Make sure you measure the ball sack circumference. You want the stretcher to fit snugly just above the testicles. Order here.

Books you might like:
The Art of the Maid
Mady's Favourite Book
Dominant Woman 
Feminine Superiority in Art
Obedient Husband
Effortless Female Superiority in a Loving Marriage
See all our books at my Amazon Author Page here Remember Amazon Prime Customers and Books Unlimited Customers can down load all my books FREE


  1. I so so wish.

    I gave up sex for lent. I loved it when my wife supported me and would not let me off early. Now she has decided no sex at least while she is on her period.

    I would much rather have love and attention. Tease = attention than cold raw sex. Cold raw sex is exciting once or twice but intimate attention is what I really crave.

    By putting your husband on a sexual diet you are giving him attention. Sure he does not get orgasm but he does know you know if his existance.

  2. Wonderful post!!! Similar situation my wife and I have, except there is no Mady. I am her full time slave doing all of the housework, ironing, clothes washing and preparing most meals. We are both retired. The evening before, my wife will tell me that I will be cleaning the house tomorrow and she will be going golfing with three friends.
    I am locked in a CB 6000 and my wife is very restrictive on me cumming. Almost every morning she will lower my panties, unlock the device pulling off the plastic shaft and tease and deny me. If I have been especially well behaved, she will allow me to edge. But no cumming. She only allows me 2 to 3 orgasms a year, 4 to 6 months apart. My last orgasm was December 2016. And she has said that I will be waiting at least until June. About twice a week my wife will tell me to massage her and give her orgasms. I will use my tongue, some clit stimulant and one of her many vibrators. I have not been allowed to enter her pussy in over 5 years. When she tells me she is allowing me an orgasm, I must put on my pink plastic panties (the ones that fit over a diaper), and she will rub me until I explode. She used to let me orgasm in my panties , but I kept making a mess as so much cum soaked thru my nylon panties onto the bed sheets. So now the plastic panties which work great.
    I am so much more attentive, caring and well behaved kept so horny. My wife says "a horny husband is a good husband".

    1. You have what I dream of. You get to interact with her and have her enjoy orgasm while staying on edge yourself.

  3. Thank you for this excellent commentary on some basic differences between male and female sexuality. Like most men, I think about sex all the time. My wife, not so much, and less so as she is getting older.
    I admit that I am anxious, somewhat afraid, of making her limited sexuality become mine. On the other hand I find the thought of surrendering my manhood and undertaking complete sexual submission in the way of nearly permanent chastity and her complete control of my (now "owned" by her) cock to be overwhelmingly exciting and fulfilling.
    Thank you for your wonderfully eloquent commentary.

  4. Totally understand. It's not a descent into sexlessness that I crave. It's being drawn closer through a sexual tension.

  5. Mr Bill, we are in similar situations. Five years ago, my wife was finding penetrative sex painful as she was in her upper 50's. The expression , when life gives you lemons, make lemonade is so true. I was her slave also at that time, and she only allowed me to enter her about 4 times a year. I was not permitted to cum inside her, I had to have a plastic cup next to me and when I was ready to cum, pull my cock out and cum into the cup. She said it was too great a privledge for a slave to make a mess in his wife, and she said that was the only way I would be allowed to cum. So when she experienced discomfort, she said no more intercourse but she would rub me in my panties in the morning, teasing and denying me. The feeling of being edged is almost as good as cumming, and it lasts much longer. Throughout the day.

  6. I don't believe you've ever mentioned whether or not you keep elliot's privates shaved?

  7. It would be wonderful if you and your slave collaborated on a diary starting from the beginning and exploring your. Path to a full day relationship including your changing feelings as your. For evolved

  8. It would be wonderful if you and your slave collaborated on a diary starting from the beginning and exploring your. Path to a full day relationship including your changing feelings as your. For evolved

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  10. Will we ever hear from You again, Miss Hanna, or see a post from elliott?