The Governess – Donna, a Serious Domina
Donna is in her thirties and works as fetish escort in a large American city. She also has international clients.
“When I first started escorting I was drawn to what you might call “dress up” dates. Lots of fun and very easy. But, gradually, I found that a lot of my clients were looking for more.” she said in a Skype interview.
“I worked in a professional dungeon for a year and discovered that I was a natural switch and that I got very bored very quickly in the traditional dominatrix role. “Yes Mistress, No Mistress.” gets old fast. So I started looking around for a niche which combined an element of domination with a character who could help differentiate me in the fetish market. And, I must admit, I wanted a character where I didn’t have to spend an hour putting on a black leather corset and extreme make-up. The Governess was born.”
“My whole role is to be in charge. Where an escort traditionally tries to pleasure her clients, I make my clients humble themselves to me. At the same time, instead of conducting my business in a dark fake dungeon with whips and chains and assorted bondage furniture, I have a lovely loft overlooking the river. Mainly white, very high ceilings and great windows.”
“I advertise very discreetly. Most of my ads are only one or two lines: sometimes they are just a word, “Governess”. The men who want my services know what that implies and I don’t want any clients who require an explanation.”
“Escorting always has an element of role playing. After all, those girls are not seeing their clients because they are possessed by desire; but the clients who use escorts seem to believe that they are the one man on earth who actually isn’t business but rather lust. My clients are under no such misapprehension.”
“One thing I learned working at the dungeon was that more than half the clients for a domina escort are really there for the play acting. The silliest toy in the world is the suede flogger. I have seen fly swatters with more ommmph. But that is what the majority of the dungeon’s clients wanted. They wanted to be helpless but safe, flogged but with no marks.”
“However, for a small minority, this sort of play-acting was exactly the opposite of what they were actually looking for. To find a woman who was very strict and very real was worth a great deal to them.”
“Taking on the role of the Governess is not at all like a standard escorting situation. First off, there is absolutely no sex. Second, the encounters tend to be quite lengthy. Two hours minimum but, realistically, four hours works better.” explained Donna.
“I have a website but it is mainly a private site which you have to have a login to access. You get the login by getting in touch with me and sending $100.00. Just enough to discourage triflers.”
“Once you are logged in you are required to fill out an application. Real name, real address, references. And then you also are required to complete a questionnaire about your preferences. It is quite a long questionnaire and several of my clients have told me that there are items listed they have never heard of.”
“Once I have checked references and read the questionnaire I make a decision as to whether I am willing to take on a particular client. I have a flat fee for the initial session. It is actually quite reasonable and many of my clients are surprised that such an exclusive service is not more expensive.”
We asked Donna what she actually did in her role as the Governess. “When a client comes to my space I greet him in character. Preliminaries are dealt with. An envelope on the hall table and then he is sent to the shower. This gives me time to count. You learn some things as a vanilla escort.”
“I am not going to go into detail but I can tell you that virtually every session begins with my client immobilized in a stress position in a very small, dark, sound proof, closet I had custom built in my loft. It sets the tone.”
“I have a couple of pretty basic outfits I wear in session: either a very fitted pencil skirt and high heels and a white cotton blouse or black jodhpurs, riding boots and a white silk blouse. My hair is pulled back. I wear a bit of red lipstick which matches my nail polish. I never take my clothes off so it doesn’t matter what I have on underneath.”
“The Governess is strict. She is demanding. She has many punishments and few rewards. It is almost the precise opposite of the typical escort date and it is also much more intense than a typical S/M dungeon encounter.”
“In a sense,” said Donna, “I could wear anything and actually do anything because this is not a dress up date, this is the real thing. My role is to train the men who see me to do exactly what they are told when they are told to do it. And to do that I punish far more often than I reward.”
“We suggested that this really sounded like a dominatrix escort date. “You asked about the difference between a dress up date and a role play. Most dominatrixes are just dressing up. Which is what their escort clients want them to do. Those clients are there for the illusion of powerlessness. A good domina can create that illusion but that is all it is.”
“What I offer, to a very select clientele, is the reality. That is the Governess’s role.” said Donna, “Let me give you an illustration. At the dungeon, at the end of the session, I almost always stepped back into real life with the client and we’d have, perhaps a cup of tea and review what went on. It was part of the service. It put some distance between the experience in the room and normalcy. We actually called it decompression.”
“When a client is finished his session in my loft I have a room where I have his clothes. It’s pitch black. I put him in that room and close the door. Then I lock that door and turn on the lights. He leaves. It is very real and he is usually very relieved and grateful. The way the room is set up it exits into a corridor which he did not come in through. It is quite disorienting.”
The distinction between the clients who wants dress up and those who want a version of reality strikes a chord with me. When I first got involved with submission I couldn’t handle those who wanted to laugh, chat and socialise alongside a supposed Dom sub relationship. This seemed to be the norm with non professionals I met and less so with professionals who I guess saw their play acting through to the end of a meeting if requested to do so. But I wanted reality, no play acting but true submission. At last I have found that with a wife who has become my Mistress, we have worked our how continual submission can work in many subtle and thoughtful ways so that we are both continually aware of its existence. The occasions of overt domination, discipline, harsh control are like the flowers that regularly blossom on our complex relationship but they are th smaller part of that relationship.
ReplyDelete