Showing posts with label Amazon. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Amazon. Show all posts

Monday, 27 January 2020

New Book for Bondage Lovers

I had an amazing experience interviewing Gillian Simpkins about her experience as a fetish photographer's assistant and mistress. Miss Simpkins is a very pretty girl and she has a lovely young maid, Imogene. Who likes bondage and girls in that order.

I have the feeling Mady will want Miss Simpkins and, especially, Imogene to become regular visitors.

I have no doubt elliot would be please with that arrangement as well. However, Miss Simpkins has her patron to attend to and photoshoots with lovely young models to arrange. Plus working in the used book store and keeping up her mistress glossiness.

But she seems to be doing very well.

You can see the book at Amazon. Here is a short excerpt:

---

I arrived at the outer door, keyed in the code, went to the inner door, keyed in the code and shoved my worldly possessions into the studio. I looked around.

Over in the photo studio space there was a girl in a corset and stockings with her arms manacled above her head. Paul was happily taking pictures and the dark haired girl was posing as hard as she could in her restraints. What do you do?

I decided to do nothing. I pushed my boxes into the studio and walked over to where Paul was engrossed with what looked like a film camera.

“Mr. Livingston, how long have you had that poor girl chained up?” I said with what I hope was a laugh in my voice.

“About half an hour Miss. I’m Jules. I’ve worked with Paul before. This is the easy part,” said the trussed up girl. “But the money is great. Are you doing a shoot?”

“Not today,” I replied. “Paul needed a stylist. I’m it.”

Somehow it seemed perfectly normal to be chatting to a woman in a black corset, heels, and, on closer inspection, vintage stockings and shackled to a pillar in a space I was moving into. Which was because Paul was so absolutely normal. He was, matter of factly, snapping pictures.

“Miss Simpkins!” he said. “So glad you’re here. Could you just lower the left cup of Jules’ corset so I can shoot her nipple. It’s fine, I have the consent right here.”

“Totally fine Paul, and a lot more fun to have a pretty girl strip me.”

We spent the next hour making Jules increasingly naked and more than a little uncomfortable.
As I hoisted her arms behind her and pulled down her panties to reveal a luxurious 1950’s bush, Jules kept up a steady stream of conversation.

“Really Paul, you’d make much more money if you stuffed something up my pussy,” She said at one point.

“Not in it for the money Jules. In it for the style and the style says we barely see your pussy,” said Paul to my surprise. “This is all about a damsel in distress; but she mostly keeps her modesty.”
Which was somewhat true if you ignore her breasts, the nipples of which Paul had had me clip twenty minutes before. And nothing mild like the adjustable clips you see in sex shops – or I saw once – rather full on bulldog clips with her nipples pushed into the gap. This was not hardcore but it was serious. I’d attached her to a gym horse looking ready for a flogging. I was really hoping Paul would not ask me to lay on the strokes. He didn’t. A dozen close ups later and we were done.

“Miss Simpkins, set a kettle to boil and you’ll find tea in the cupboard. You did beautifully, Jules.”
I’d unstrapped Jules and brought her a robe.

“It was fun Paul,” said Jules unconsciously rubbing her clipped and swollen nipples under the robe. “It always is. And now you have an assistant.”

“I do.”

“Will she be…”

“Not today Jules. In future, perhaps,” said Paul.

“Well then, still my turn,” said Jules and she dropped to her knees in front of Paul, took his cock out of his nicely pleated wool trousers, and got to work sucking. She didn’t even take the clips off her nipples.

As I made tea, I could see her head bobbing up and down and, in a couple of minutes, just when the tea was done, so was Paul.

“Thank you, dear Jules,” he said. “Now, tea?”

“In a moment Paul, I’ll just go and rinse.”

And off she trotted to the bathroom entirely unconcerned that she’d just given her photographer a very public blow job.

I brought the tea to the coffee table where Paul had been so recently serviced.

“Really?” I said.

“Mostly,” said Paul. “I make it very worth their while.”

“Then whatever do you want me for?” I asked genuinely perplexed.

“I need to stop. I still want to shoot for my collection but I can’t afford the possibility that one of these girls is going to turn on me. Not Jules, but one of them will eventually and that will cost me a lot of money and a good deal of reputation,” he said.

Thursday, 23 January 2020

The Mistress Option

Mady had two girlfriends come to stay just after New Years. We had great fun dressing elliot as a maid of all work and having him serve the ladies at lunch and for cocktails and dinner. Needless to say the girls were both amazed and eventually amused as Mady and I put elliot through his paces.

His humiliation was enhanced when, each afternoon, he was required to submit to a punishment: the first day it was a good hard shower brushing because he had stared just a little too hard as Chriss - one of the girls - very ample chest. He had to lift his maid's skirt and pull down his frilly rumba panties before I gave him a lecture about respecting women and then two dozen good swats.

The next day Mady wanted to show her friends how easy it was to make a man ejaculate even when he is locked in a chastity cage. She bent him over a cane backed chair with a saucer below his imprisoned cock flipped his skirt up and pushed his remote-controlled prostate massager up his backdoor. It only took a few minutes before he was dripping ejaculate onto the saucer. And, of course, when he was drained he had to drink up his mess. The girls were mesmerized.

The last day they were with us, Mady and I thought they should have a bit of fun. First, each girl practised with a light cane on poor elliot's bruised bottom. It took a little while, and many "vocalizations" from elliot before each was able to accurately deliver her dozen strokes. "No, dear, you have to hit both cheeks otherwise you won't get the right welt pattern." Then elliot was required to thank each of the girls with his tongue before being sent to his corner. Great fun for the girls and for Mady and I. Not so much for elliot but that really doesn't matter.

I had a wonderful time as both Chriss and Amber were intelligent, pretty and polite. We had lovely dinners where the ladies dressed - which kept elliot in his role as lady's maid busy and deeply excited. All that perfect young female flesh to help groom and dress. I kept him in his little cell when he was off duty so he could think about the lovely breasts and pretty pussies he had to tend. Which meant that, after dinner we could talk very freely.

Both girls loved the idea of female dominance and both were intrigued at the idea of female led relationships and, eventually, wife led marriages. But, as Amber asked, "What do we do while we look for the right man?"

They were a bit taken aback when I said, "Have some fun, make some money, become mistresses."

"You mean like dommes?" said Chriss.

"Good Heavens, no," I said laughing. "Too risky, too boring and there is actually an upfront cost to set up a dungeon - which is what men who visit pro-dommes often expect. No, I mean mistresses in the old fashioned sense of the word. A girl kept by a wealthy older man."

"When you go to bed tonight I'll leave Miss Jay's book, Modern Mistress on your tablets," said Mady.

Which she did and both girls read the first fifty or sixty pages in bed.

The next morning we left elliot in his cell and the girls in their pretty nighties (I insist on them wearing white cotton Victorian nighties which matched Mady's) sat around the breakfast table.

"Well, girls," I said, "What did you think?"

"It all sounds great Miss Jay, but, really, in this day and age don't you think it is a little oppressive for a woman to be "kept" by a man?" said Amber...And we were off.

"Not at all," I said. "In fact, if anything, it is a huge first step towards a woman's freedom and, if she chooses, her leadership in her relationships and her marriage."

"How is sleeping with a man for money a step towards freedom?" asked Chriss. Mady smiled having heard this before.

"Chriss, the fact is that money is, in fact, power," I said settling back in my chair and sipping on a very pleasing latte. "When a man gives a woman money he is, in fact, giving her a bit of power. The opportunity to take advantage of a broader array of choices. In exchange, she gives him the pleasure of her company. Escorts have known this since pretty much forever."

"However, escorting, even at the highest end, is essentially transactional. I talk about all that in my book Avails. Lots of girls have escorted but very few of them have really understood how they can make top dollar at minimal risk," I said. "And the biggest problem with escorting is risk. Physical risk, legal risk and, frankly, moral hazard: it is very easy to become very cynical when you sleep with, to use the euphemism, even three or four men a week, much less a night. Cynical girls lose their charm very quickly which is tragic because charm lasts very much longer than youth or beauty."

"Fair enough," said Amber. "Having one man give you money for your company makes more sense but I still can't see how it is particularly liberating. You still pretty much have to sleep with the guy."

"Eventually," I said. "But not until you have made your arrangement. And that arrangement can be very liberating indeed. Have you ever been poor? I mean not knowing where your next meal is coming from poor?"

"Not really," said Amber. "My parents have a bit of money and I can always go home if stuff gets bad."

"I have," said Chriss. "It really sucks."

"And have you ever had more money than you really needed?" I asked. "Money where you could get a blowout and your nails done and buy the dress, the shoes and the bag?"

"All the same day? asked Amber.

"The same day," I replied.

Both girls shook their heads.

"I'm not surprised," I said. "Most young women, even as well educated as the two of you are, don't start earning significant money until they are in their mid-thirties and, realistically, that is usually when they really want to have kids. Soooo."

"A bit of sexual economics. Your "arm candy" years begin at about twenty and end around twenty-five or six. Now, the fact is that women are actually more beautiful in their late twenties and early thirties and if they do it right, keep becoming more interesting as they get older. But a pretty girl commands peak market price for all of six or seven years," I said. "Most girls waste those years looking for Mr. Right or chasing the entry-level jobs they think will create a payoff down the road or going to school. But, mainly, they waste the time because they can't think of what else they might be doing."

"Being kept by a wealthy older man is not a huge time commitment," I continued. "Usually an evening mid-week and, perhaps, a Saturday afternoon."

"No way," said Chriss. "That's what, maybe eight hours a week?"

"At most, dear, at most," I said.

"And you get your rent covered, pretty clothes, spa days," said Amber.

"If you negotiate well, that and lots more," I said. "Remember, the sort of man who keeps a mistress is taking home serious money. He is probably billing out his time at $500+ an hour or running a company or fixing people's teeth. A couple of thousand a month is nothing, 10K and you are beginning to be a noticeable expense. Keep reading Modern Mistress, some of the girls I talked to have really luxurious lives and they tuck money away every month."

"I flipped forward, Miss Jay, and you're right. The girls do make fabulous money sometimes," said Amber. "But how does that make me "free" if I have to put up with some guy old enough, as the saying goes, to be my father being able to have me whenever he wants?"

"Amber, you need to read the whole thing and a few of my extended interviews as well," I said. "No mistress gives her patron unlimited access. That's for escorts, sugar babies and side pieces: a mistress is none of those things nor would a suitable patron ever expect such a thing. And, truth to tell, ladies, past a certain age, most men are simply not that interested in 24/7 sex. They will be delighted to see their mistress once or twice a week."

"OK, but how does even that make me "free"?" asked Amber.

"It makes you better than "free"; it gives you actual power," I said. "Earning an allowance and treats by being a beautiful, intelligent, interested woman lets you do what you want with the rest of your time. Finish a degree, learn to trade stocks, master the PR game but with the sure knowledge that you are not going to miss a meal or be short on rent. Instead of being a "starving student" or an "unpaid intern" struggling to get by with a side gig, a mistress has the luxury of her own time to do what she wants."

"But that depends on a man," said Chriss.

"It does," I replied. "Here's a hint ladies...men want us to depend on them and when we do we take control. As a mistress, you have control of a part of a man's life, as a wife you have the whole thing."

Which I left them with as I had things to do but later that afternoon Amber and Chriss came into my sitting room.

"Miss Jay, do you have a few minutes?" asked Amber.

"Of course...more questions?"

"A few," said Chriss. "We've been reading and talking and, well, ok. How is it fair that to gain any power, girls have to sleep with men who..."

"Stop right there Chriss. Girls always have huge potential power," I said. "The question is will they use it? And if they use it will they use it with any sort of strategy."

"A million years ago I would put on a pretty dress and a nice pair of heels, walk a couple of blocks to a well known steakhouse and, in no more than twenty minutes, be bought a drink or two and, if the gentleman seemed interesting, a very good steak and a bottle of wine. Yes, there were "expectations" but, no, I never felt the slightest obligation. If I was on heat I might well have taken the gentleman home, but not always. And never if I didn't want to. That, of course, was purely tactical. A near term objective as it were. But, and here is the thing, there was an older gentleman who noticed me. He could easily have bought the steakhouse with pocket change. He certainly bought a lot of girls dinner and there was no messing about. Take the dinner you went home with the man. He invited me several times and I declined. He was my first patron."

"Played hard to get," said Amber giggling.

"Not at all. Just hard to get for him. Because I wanted him."

"How could you tell?" asked Chriss.

"When elliot is out of uniform, take a look at his watch. It is one of several but it is my favourite because I gave it to him. It is not a show off's watch, white gold, no diamonds, a Patek Philippe Calatrava. My first patron wore a very similar watch but in 18k gold," I said. "Then shoes, then suit. Now, to be fair, this was when successful men dressed. Now it may be a matter of recognizing a good sweater or the right phone, but the point is the same. Men who have done well have a look. To find them you go to the places they like to go, a couple of bars, a couple of steakhouses, certain sorts of events."

"And you're saying we should not be cynical," said Chriss.

"What's cynical about wanting a very good man who can afford to keep you?" I said. "In fact, for a small, select, minority of women spending a few years as a mistress allows them to reach their full potential. Plus, for a small, select, minority of men, keeping a mistress acknowledges their own proper position as subservient to at least one woman. Even if the acknowledgement is only tacit."

"Really? said Chriss. "I am not sure how being serviced once a week by a girl young enough to be your daughter is exactly subservient."

"Because you are not seeing the whole picture," I said smiling. "First off, he is being "serviced" by a girl who is receiving a significant allowance, is likely living in a nice apartment with good furniture rent free and who, if she has negotiated cleverly, will have a wardrobe and grooming allowance. Second, a mistress, by her nature and position is "in charge" of the time her patron spends with her. She sets the rules, she decides if she will have sex and what sort of sex she'll have. A good mistress is demanding. Her patron has to satisfy her. Which is what keeps him coming back."

"That never seems to be the way it works in my relationships," said Amber.

"Of course not," I said. "You are likely dating and sleeping with boys your own age using the currency of lust and love. Which is wonderful at your age but, frankly, a bit of a waste of your time. I gather neither of you are rushing to find a husband right now."

Both girls shook their head. "Way too soon."

"So, if you decided to take the mistress option one big change you'd make is to move away from the boy/girl sex world of high school. For a mistress, sex and pleasure are part of a fantasy which her patron is buying," I said. "While patrons often think they want their mistress for sex, a clever mistress offers much more than that."

"At the same time, a mistress knows that the best sex a man is ever likely to have is with an enthusiastic, uninhibited, young woman who actually takes charge in the bedroom," I said. "And, of course, that carries right through to a female-led relationship or marriage. For a variety of reasons, even now, men think they have to take the sexual initiative. There is no good reason for that, but there it is. A smart mistress will take matters in hand as it were."

"But why would a man want that?" asked Chriss.

"Two reasons, first the sheer novelty of a pretty young girl having her wicked way with him, second, and more importantly, men take mistresses for the luxury of real relaxation. Most men who can afford a mistress are insanely busy and are making decisions all day," I said. "Knowing that for a few hours a couple of times a week there are no decisions, no real choices, is really what a patron ends up valuing most in his mistress."

"You make that sound so easy, Miss Jay," said Amber. "But, at the end of the day, a patron is still going to want to have sex."

"Indeed. Or at least that's what he thinks he wants," I said. "Men are not very subtle and they are not very good at actually knowing or articulating what they want. In fact, most men want to be listened to, teased a little, seduced and know that, if they do what they are told, the evening will end happily. For a mistress an evening will be about comfort food, a moderate amount of good wine, a sexy - but not slutty - outfit, flowers, candles and enthusiasm. A few evenings like that and a patron will wonder how he ever lived without his mistress."

"The other great benefit of being a mistress, besides the money and the freedom that money brings, is that a girl learns how to manage, take charge of a man," I said. "If I had not been a mistress there is no way I would have been able to give my darling elliot what he so desperately needed. The experience of having a non-romantic, sexual relationship with a strong, successful, man is something every girl should have. But very few girls will because they are content to drift along in peer relationships."

"OK, so let's say I wanted to try being a mistress," said Amber. "Where would I find this wonderful, wealthy, patron?"

"Well, if both of you were looking..."

"We might be," said Chriss.

"Then you'll have a great advantage. One pretty girl is not entirely safe, two and you can take care of each other," I said. "Unfortunately, the nicest way, which is to be introduced by an older lady such as myself, is not really available as I am very much a homebody. However, there is a simple rule: go where the fish are. In the little city you both live in there are, in no particular order, car shows, boat shows, gallery openings, at least one excellent book store and, as I recall, a couple of fairly high end restaurants. It is not difficult to get on the PR lists for openings. And there is nothing at all wrong with a bit of discrete advertising. And don't worry too much about age, there are plenty of men in their late thirties who would love to take a mistress if they had any clue what that was."

Amber looked a bit troubled. "Miss Jay, one thing bothers me about this. A lot of these prospective patrons are married."

"Ideally," I said. "It makes everything much simpler."

"But isn't that cheating?" asked Amber.

"It is. A mistress, however, is a realist. The fact is that men of a certain age and success often cheat. Often with disastrous consequences. A powerful man is surrounded by temptation - personal assistants, work colleagues, vendors, professionals, girls at conferences - the list is endless and involvement with any of them can lead to sexual harassment claims, long hours with the HR department and, of course, the girl falling in love with the man with all that can lead to including a very expensive divorce."

"A smart wife wants to limit her exposure to any of these consequences," I said. "Now most wives will not be lucky enough to have a Mady but, in a sense, they should welcome a young woman who has no long term designs on their husband. Most men are very discrete about their mistresses but women have a sixth sense when it comes to another woman and this poses an intelligence test. If a wife finds out about a mistress what does she do?"

"So, I will tell you one story and then I have to get on with the day. When I was about your age and was being kept by what was known as a "lumber baron", sweet man, I got a call one afternoon from his wife. She introduced herself on the phone as Mrs. X, Ken X's wife and asked if might meet for lunch the following day.

I agreed, what else could I do, and having dressed carefully, went to a very pleasant little restaurant where the maitre d' escorted me to a table where a wonderfully attractive woman of a certain age rose to greet me.

"So you're Hannah. Turn," she said making a little gesture with a perfectly manicured hand. "Oh you are just perfect. Me, thirty years ago. What a pretty dress. Sit down."

"I suppose you wonder how I know about you," said Mrs. X. "Ken has always talked in his sleep. For the last few weeks he has been saying lovely things about a girl named Hannah and two nights ago he actually said, "Time to play with Hannah Jay."

"No..."

"Oh yes. It was perfect, just like Ken." said Mrs. X.

"You seem very relaxed about all this," I said to her.

"Of course, my dear. Ken has worked hard, cut down a lot of trees and treated me and the children beautifully. We are very dear friends, more than a little in love but he's at that age where he realizes the road ahead is shorter than the one behind. That bothers men. A lot. I was worried that you might be a secretary or something but a quick look at the account Ken doesn't think I know about told the story. You're his mistress! Which is wonderful but I thought we should meet. And you should call me Jean."

Quite honestly this was the last thing I expected. I was prepared to be called a hussy and a lot worse. Or for a tearful, "Please don't take my man" scene. But this was extraordinary.

"I'm delighted you approve," I said.

"Approve? My only regret is that I didn't think of the solution myself. You've put a bounce in Ken's step and he's taking things a day at a time rather than brooding over what he is going to do in retirement. But you mustn't tell him," said Jean.

"Tell him what?"

"That I know," said Jean. "I think half the fun of having a mistress is in the sneaking around, the stolen hours. Men love that sort of thing and it would take a lot of the fun out of it if Ken knew I knew and approved."

I laughed out loud. "You know him very well."

"I do," said Jean. "Being married to someone for thirty years has that effect."

"And you really don't mind?"

"Not at all. You are pretty, and nicely built if I may say so, obviously intelligent and on the payroll. Quite seriously, my great worry was that Ken would find some young girl who would think she was in love with him. That can get very messy for everyone," said Jean. "Looking at Ken's account, you are a very practical young woman."

"I've had to be," I said.

"True for most young girls," said Jean. "Now you can have a bit of fun and, if you can keep Ken interested, earn a tidy little nest egg. Something you should know is that Ken absolutely loves giving people presents. Just out of the blue."

"I've noticed that already. Very thoughtful things like a perfect hairbrush and practical things like a dozen pairs of fully fashioned stockings."

"You wear stockings! No wonder Ken enjoys you. I've always worn stockings because Ken loves them but the young girls today, if they wear hose at all, wear those awful pantihose. For a big, rough, lumberjack, Ken is actually quite smart about pretty lingerie and fine leather goods, gloves, shoes, purses, I have a closet full of really beautiful bags he picked out. In fact, maybe that is why he's taken a mistress, I already have everything I want or need."

We had a very good lunch, a bottle of good wine and a nice hug, "Take care of Ken, Hannah. He is a wonderful guy."

"It would make a better story if Jean and I had lunched monthly but we didn't. Ken kept me for a little over two years when I moved to another city," I said. "I missed him for years."

"No wonder you are such a fan of mistresshood," said Amber. "That sounds perfect."

"It was. And, interestingly, it was as a twenty-something mistress that I learned a key fact about successful, wealthy, men; more often than not they need a place in their lives where they are not under stress, don't have to make decisions, can simply do what they are told," I said. "Ken would never have thought of himself as submissive but when he came to my apartment I was completely in charge. And that grew over time. Especially as I found myself enjoying being in charge."

"About twenty years ago, elliot and I were at a party and we ran into Ken and Jean. It was one of those moments which could have gone either way but Ken marched over and said, "Hannah, you must introduce me to your husband". I did and he introduced me to his wife and not another word was said. We were simply old friends who had not seen each other for years. But I did notice that Ken watched how I led, subtly, elliot even in a completely social situation. At the end of the evening, he came back over. "You're a very lucky man, Elliot," was all he said.
























Tuesday, 5 November 2019

Beginning as an ultra high end courtesan

escort, courtesan
As my readers know, I am fascinated with women who take their sexual power into their own hands whether it is by taking charge of their marriage, becoming a mistress or exploring the world of the courtesan.

I have been at work transcribing the story of Amy Jenkins, banker by day and, well, being tutored in the art of the courtesan by Miss Charlotte Corday the leading lady of the night in a small, rather wealthy, East Coast city.  The series is called "Only on a Tuesday" and the first book is available free at Amazon.com

Amy, as I have written, is a delightful woman entirely comfortable with the life she has chosen and the many rewards it has brought her. In this first book, she is displayed for one of the gentlemen who will become a patron in her future.

Thursday, 31 October 2019

Wifedom Books, Mistresses, Escorts, Smut and More

As many of you know, elliot and I have published a number of books. Over the years it has grown into quite a substantial

You can find elliot's collection here https://amzn.to/2wIiej4.

My, much smaller collection including a femdom novel fragment and several books about mistresses and escorts can be found here: https://amzn.to/2IlVDOU.

A great way to access all our books is to sign up for a free 30 Prime trial. You get all our books and many more female led marriage, lingerie and beauty books for no cost:
https://amzn.to/2WtF1bE


While I keep trying to finish my own guide to female led relationships, here are a few guides I have found helpful. They are not quite elliot's and my relationship, but they are interesting and cover some of the essentials:

dominant wife

The Dominant Wife Rulebook


This is an interesting approach for couples who want the wife to lead but are not quite sure how to make that happen. 

It really is a list of suggested rules the husband has to obey along with punishments for infractions.

I would describe this as a beginner's book and it is very popular. 

You can buy it here or try Prime for Free










Femdom for Nice Girls: A Self-Guided Manual for the Caring Mistress


This manual is much more my cup of tea. 

It is nicely written and takes on the question of how a "nice girl" can also lead her relationship, discipline her man and have a wonderful time doing it.

Most importantly, it assumes that its reader is very hesitant about assuming the dominant role in her relationship. So, if you are a wife who has been asked to explore taking charge or if you are a husband who wants a way to ask his wife to become the head of household this is an excellent place to start.

You can order it here or try Prime for Free

Locked-In Love: How two weeks in chastity can end the barter system, renew courtship and make a better husband


A lovely book about the positive effects of enforced male chastity.

There is no question at all that a man in a chastity device is more attentive, obedient and, in time, grateful. This book is about one couple's exploration of male chastity.

Nicely written from the male perspective, this is a story of how a marriage was transformed from a "barter system" where the husband constantly tried to manipulate his wife into a more pleasant, and I would say, correct situation simply by locking up the husband's cock.

You can order it here try Prime for Free 

Sunday, 14 July 2019

A Huge Change

Good things can be delivered
As many of you will have figured out by now, elliot and I are a somewhat older couple. Old enough that we actually remember the world when there was no internet. No, really.

Before the internet, while there were certainly lots of couples in which the wife was in charge, there was little or nothing to support FLRs. Next to no information was available. And not just about the wonderful world of Female Led Relationships, the entire world of even slightly exotic sexuality was very much under the counter. Now, virtually any interest has its own blog universe, very possibly social media (under the radar slightly) and you can buy virtually any little item you want from...Amazon.

The ability to buy discreetly has been a huge bonus for elliot, Mady and myself. We are coming up to Amazon Prime Days (and yes you really should try Prime for free for 30 days if for no other reason than you will be able to read all of both elliot's and my books for free.)

A lot of websites will be doing Prime Days promotions. I will not but I thought it might be fun for dominant wives and their submissive husbands to have a look at what is actually available at Amazon.

Start with male chastity devices. Even ten years ago putting your husband into chastity was an expensive proposition with proper cock cages running several hundred dollars. Now you can put your husband under lock and key for less than $30. And the selection is amazing.

I keep elliot in a soft chastity cage like this one. It is comfortable and he can wear it easily for weeks at a time. The overall effect is that he not only cannot touch his own penis, he cannot become fully erect and, he tells me, that he has virtually no external stimulation when he is in his cock cage.

We got out first silicone cock cage from Amazon. Like the one pictured, it cost less than $20 and with Prime it shipped free.





For a slightly more severe experience and one which can be more than a little noisy, a metal cock cage may be in order. There is nothing discreet about putting your husband's cock in a steel cage and keeping the key.

This is also an excellent option for men who, at present, are not in obedience to a particular woman. Putting your cock in a steel cage and making access to your key difficult is an excellent way for men to remind themselves of their essential submissiveness.

The other good thing about a metal cage is that it is often fairly obvious that a man is wearing one. Certainly to a discerning eye. Wives who want to subtly demonstrate their husband's status or single men who would like to make their submission more obvious to the women they encounter may want a metal cock cage.

Now, if a cock cage demonstrates a dominant wife's total control over her husband's sexuality or a single man's willingness to sacrifice his sexuality in the hope of finding his superior woman, the general subordinating effect of forcing a man to wear women's lingerie and nightwear can't be discounted.

A number of ladies who read this blog have purchased these amazing, Slimming Underwear Tummy Control Panties. One lady wrote me and said, "Since I have had Paul wearing these over his cage daily he has been even more docile and willing to please. Plus, they have already improved his figure. I call them belly busters."

Keeping your husband in panties is a good first step. But for real control and humiliation, a long legged, side zipped, pantie girdle is perfect. Where the high waisted panties have a little control, a good girdle will literally change his figure. He'll have a more defined waist and a nicely curved bottom. (Between ourselves, I love the feel of a side zipped open bottom girdle holding my stockings up.)

A submissive husband needs practical foundations. There is no point in getting him pretty lingerie. He's a man, he'll look silly in frills (which can be fun too). So a plain, white, lycra bomb is all he deserves.



Caged and girdled by day, what about when a submissive husband is sent to bed? Well, of course the cock cage stays on and his morning wood will be uncomfortable enough that he'll wake up and get started making you coffee in bed, running your bath, doing any hand washing you have left for him. elliot has to wash out my yesterday's panties after he has his corner time. There are some things it is better for a submissive husband to do himself even though we have a maid.

I prefer nice, feminine cotton nighties for elliot. You may have other preferences. And for single men, wearing a cotton nightie to bed every night will remind you of your place and where you would like to be. After a few days or weeks putting on a pretty nightie will just be part of your bedtime routine.

Now the great advantage of a fairly full coverage nightie is that it gives a wife the opportunity to experiment with a few more feminizing humiliations.
I am not a huge fan of making men wear bras during the day when they are out of the home. It can work in very limited circumstances but, usually, it simply leads to awkwardness in a workplace or a social situation.

However, in bed, in a nightie, there is absolutely no reason why a wife can't tell her husband to wear a bra and the breast forms which go with it.

Having experimented with elliot, while it might be fun to see your husband having to deal with DD cup breasts, a nice B to start and then work up to a C or D. The point is that when your husband is getting ready for bed and is in bed and when he wakes up and sets about serving you he will look different and feel different. There is nothing more feminizing than the weight of breasts and the more modern breast forms and a good bra will give your husband a real sense of that. And, of course, for a single man to make breasts a part of his evening ritual is excellent training for his eventual female led marriage.

One thing I would strongly suggest, and other wives have confirmed this, is that you require your husband to wear a well made, very supportive but very utilitarian sports bra. Pretty lingerie is for you (and your maid if you are lucky enough to have one), your husband is supposed to feel the full weight of his breasts and that's where a good sports bra makes all the difference.

And remember, in a well-run female led marriage, your husband is almost always sent to get ready for bed sometime before you retire. This means he can put on his breast forms, sports bra and nightie without you really having to see anything but the pleasing curves under his nightie.


Of course, some husbands need more discipline than others and Amazon is there to help. When you
are first training a husband or boyfriend it is a good idea to be able to restrain him. While I no longer need restraints for elliot, I still have a wonderful set of police grade handcuffs I purchased a decade ago. The nice thing about serious handcuffs is they will fit in your purse so you can restrain and correct your submissive male where ever you happen to be. In our early days, elliot learned the hard way that dressing rooms and washrooms offered the privacy, if not the sound proofing required for a gentleman's correction.

There are many occasions when a gentleman needs to be restrained for some time or under some tension. Handcuffs are the wrong tool. Well made, lined, leather wrist and ankle restraints are the obvious solution. But, for Heaven's Sake, buy high quality restraints. You want your submissive husband to be mindful of his correction or your pleasure, not worrying about how his wrists are chaffing.


As to corrections themselves, a dominant wife should recognize that her hand alone is not going to do the job. The fact is that a lady's hand is too small and too soft to make much of an impression. Using a hair brush helps a lot. And a lady, with a reasonably sized bag, can carry a hairbrush entirely innocently and deploy it as needed. As I mentioned, there are any number of usefully private locations available if your husband or boyfriend is rude or inattentive. This little brush will leave a lasting impression.

For more serious infractions, principally disobedience or resistance, but also having what I refer to as an obnoxious attitude, sterner measures and a lot more leverage will be required. As I have often written, in a serious FLR, punishment is a very real thing. Faced with a recalcitrant husband or boyfriend, a lady needs to be willing to inflict serious pain and, in many cases, leave bruises or welts. You are doing your submissive no favours by holding back when they need correction.

elliot's least favourite implement is also one which you can see any time you go into a bathroom
equipped with a shower or bath in our house. The simple, long handled, shower brush can be kept in plain sight as a reminder to your husband or boyfriend of the consequences of any disobedience. In the early stages of an FLR this sort of everyday implement is going to see a lot of use. It takes a while to train any man worth training. This beechwood shower brush has a 17 and 3/4 inch handle. As the copy says, good for reaching those "hard to reach" areas - in our case psychological rather than physical.



Some disciplinary wives swear by the paddle for their husband's correction. I have to take their word for it as I have never used a paddle on elliot. There is an amazing selection of paddles at Amazon ranging from a rather nasty looking hardwood paddle:


on through to a selection of bamboo paddles. I have to say I am seriously considering getting this wide bamboo paddle, not for elliot but for Mady. Her skin is a little too delicate for the cane and the shower brush seems to give me too much leverage when my naughty little maid needs correction. This is obviously a light duty paddle and correcting Mady is all about repetition, not force.

I have been correcting elliot with a rattan cane (go to your local garden shop or China town, but use rattan, not bamboo which tends to splinter) and a dozen strokes will certainly call him to order. But, I have to admit, I am also becoming fond of an item which is called a heel stick. Just under three feet with a very solid, rubber, handle. It weighs a little more than a rattan cane and leaves welts a little faster with less effort on my part. elliot hates it almost as much as the shower brush.


Until we met Mady and she became my maid, I was not really familiar with the varieties of anal humiliation a submissive husband can undergo. Yes, I did know about prostate milking and I thoroughly approved of the idea of restraining elliot, pushing a vibrator into his bottom and leaving him to make a non-orgasmic mess he would have to lick up later.  In fact, we wrote a book about it, A Ladies Guide to Prostate Milking. However, Mady opened up a whole other dimension.

Coming from a certain corner of the lesbian world, Mady just loved strap ons. While strap ons do nothing for me, Mady thoroughly enjoys “pegging” elliot as a preliminary to his paying her oral attention. But, Mady being Mady, she has evolved this into a bit of a ritual and the first part of the ritual is that Elliot has to go to her room, strip naked and present his bottom for an enema. “I like to peg a clean bottom,” says Mady. And good for her.

To that end she had me order this rather simple but effective enema kit:

"Two bags and he's clean if a little shaky," explained Mady. "I'll often have him stand in his corner for a few minutes before allowing him to release. Once the second bag has gone in, I will stand in front of him and put on my strap on. I use dils which have a nice end for the lady and a rather larger end for the gentlemen. I let elliot release and then he knows he has to assume his position for pegging. I lube him up a bit and then push in. He's used to it now and he knows I am going to fuck him until I come. When I'm done I leave the dil in him, unclip the harness and leave him to clean up."

Mady's strap on is very similar to this one although she has a couple of different sized dils, one a little bigger and one a little smaller.


The extraordinary thing is that all of these items and thousands more are available at Amazon at quite reasonable prices. With a Free Prime Trial you don't have to pay for shipping and, while you are waiting for your order to arrive, you can read all my books and elliot's books free.








Friday, 21 June 2019

The Domina Escort

I recently received a note from a young lady who had read some of my books on escorting - Questions for Miss Jay and Money Sex and was curious as to how she could expand her escorting business in more dominant directions. Had she read Avails: Escorting for the Elegant Woman she would have come across this chapter on that very topic.

----

Dominant Dates the Easy Way

The great world of domination and submission, BDSM, whips, chains and dungeons--- looks, and is, complicated. Just putting together a dungeon costs thousands of dollars. With no certainty that you will attract enough paying customers to see a great return on your investment. Plus there are the leather outfits, thigh high boots, and all the other accoutrements of the domina. Great if that’s your passion, but what if it isn’t?

In every market, there are the hardcore D&S aficionados who will pay serious money to have their particular fantasy fulfilled. But there are many more men whose submissive tendencies don’t run to being in suspension bondage in a frilly little girl’s dress. Or, to be more accurate, they may have that fantasy but they don’t want, or need, to act it out. Instead, what they are seeking is willing submission to a demanding woman.

The psychology of a client’s needs are not an escort’s business; her business is to meet those needs profitably. However, knowing a little about the dynamics of a dominant/submissive relationship gives a girl an advantage.

In cartoon form, a lot of men, particularly alpha men are “on” all the time. At work they have to make decisions, argue cases, prescribe drugs, borrow and lend money. At home they have ambitious wives, high achieving (or not) kids, and constant pressure. Even a game of golf becomes a competition. All of their actions have consequences. There is no escape from the pressure and thus, the stress simply accumulates.

There is no obvious place in this unbalanced world for a man to simply relax. Going to see an escort, even for a quick encounter, is more than just relief of sexual tension. It is a brief respite from the stress and pressure of their everyday life. It is half an hour or an hour devoted to their own pleasure, their own needs. For many men that experience is rewarding enough that they will become a regular, or keep a mistress, or give themselves regular treats.

However, for a significant minority of men, even a great “girlfriend experience” does not take them far enough outside themselves. In a nutshell, they are still in control. They are still calling the shots. They think they are going to relax with a girl when, in fact, they are worried about their performance, whether she’s having a great time, if they are getting their money’s worth. Instead of a pleasing escape they find themselves loaded with more of their own expectations. (Not to mention all the standard worries men bring to their escort experience.)

So the essential dynamic at the root of the dominant/submissive, F/m experience is the removal of choice from the submissive male. At the most basic level the submissive client does what he is told.
Most experienced escorts know that the vast majority of their clients, in fact, “do what they are told” but the difference between the straight and the submissive client is that the sub gets extra excitement from the telling.

Tools of the Trade

Once part of your business becomes domination, you’ll never see a hardware store quite the same way. However, you are not in the dungeon business so you need to be able to achieve symbolic superiority with a very limited array of tools and toys. Here’s a bit of a shopping list:

1.      Zip-ties – 12inch, as wide as possible
2.      Rattan canes – go to your local Chinatown or a garden center – rattan is best but bamboo will do. Cut to correct length for your carry tube. Wrap top five inches in black electrical tape, take two of differing thicknesses
3.      Paddle – thrift stores have wonderful, over sized, salad tools in wood
4.      Xxtra large slips/panties, camisoles – the thrift store is your friend
5.      Rubber gloves/disposable gloves
6.      Dildo/prostate massager  – err on the small side
7.      Riding crop – tack store or thrift
8.      Art carry tube – 36 inches – ideal for canes, crops, and the rest of the tools of the trade
9.      21 feet, 3/8 inch cotton (not nylon) rope in 3 foot pieces
10.  A couple of pairs of old nylon stockings

Those are the basics. The most expensive item on the list is the carry tube which Amazon sells for $28.50. (Amazon is a great place for all manner of out of the way items.) With a little imagination, you can create a whole world of submission for your client simply by unzipping your carry case.

Dressing the Part

While the correct answer to the question, “What does a dominant woman wear?” is “Anything she wants to,” your submissive clients will tend to have visions of a black leather corset and the black high heels from Hell. While you might indulge their fantasies, the fact is leather corsets are expensive and uncomfortable. Worse, they imply you are undressed and that is something a submissive is rarely going to see.

Looks which can work well include a simple, below the knee skirt and a sheer blouse with a lacy white bra; the same skirt but with a fitted leather jacket and black lacy bra. School teacher skirt and little jacket – in a demure tweed. A pretty, above the knee LBD (little black dress) with appropriate stockings and heels. Stockings, not pantyhose. Stocking can be lacy stay-ups, or garters and all. I assure you, once you get the hang of it you will love them.

The overall look is feminine and a bit aloof. Glasses are always a good option. So is having your hair up. The naughty librarian look is well worth trying.

One key psychological element often at play is that your clients are reaching back into their early lives for a woman who represents authority. So dressing a few decades out of date can trigger the right responses.

Leave the fake dominatrix outfits in the sex shop for the suburban bad girls to wear on “date night”. Same with things like nurse’s uniforms. At the same time, if you can find a wonderful old, real, nurse’s outfit – ideally with the great old starched nurse’s cap – grab it and use it.

One element to keep in mind is that these sorts of dates are at least an hour long, so you want to be comfortable. Six inch heels are perfect for a quick turn around the bed, but are not so great for supervising your submissive charge.

Showtime

The domina date is more than a little different from a regular escort encounter. Off the top, there is no sex. Or at least none which involves you. Which raises the question: so what, exactly do you do??

For the moment let’s assume you are entertaining in your own space. Your gentleman arrives and, if you are wise, you have him place his tribute (domina word for gift) on your hall table. Business attended to, there are several ways for the date to go. The difficulty here is that you can’t really guess what will actually give him the release he is looking for.

Some girls in this situation opt for a full and frank conversation before entering into the “session”. Not at all a bad idea. Indeed some professional dominatrix’s  have full on questionnaires for their clients to fill out online or prior to the session. However, there is a slightly better alternative.

It begins with your assumption of superiority. Your client is not there to be consulted, he is there to do what he is told. And that begins with being sent to take a shower. Obedient men, even if they just had a shower, will dutifully have another. Brats will put up a fuss: which is perfect because now they have to take a cold shower and you will tell them when they may come out. Tell them not to lock the door. As they are showering you have the opportunity to check your tribute and prepare for the next move.

Depending on your mood, you can leave them a short men’s robe or, for fun, a pretty ladies robe. In either case, remove all of their clothing and place it somewhere out of the way. When they emerge from their shower in their robe you should be seated in a chair with a clear space in front of it.

Have your client come before you on your chair and tell him to turn around and present his wrists. Using the zip ties fasten his wrists, loose tie on each wrist and then a tie between the wrists behind his back. The objective is to have him effectively helpless. Then you tell him to turn around.

Some girls like their subs to kneel at this stage, others like to keep them standing. The point is that they are now in your power. And, to make that point very clear, you can unbelt their robe to expose their often shower shrunk bits and pieces.

It is usually at this point that you give him the name he is to call you. My own preferences are “Miss” or “Ma’am”, “Mistress” can work but I think it sounds a bit arch as does Mi’Lady or Princess. However, harkening back to school days with a name like “Miss Pierce” will sometimes put your client into the right mood. Make it clear that he is to use that form of address and no other or there will be consequences. He is also to speak only when spoken to or asked a direct question.

It is also a good idea to set a “safe word” at this point. Although your session is not at all likely to push any limits, knowing that saying “stove top” or “periwinkle” will call a timeout is a source of some security for your client and safety for you.

Now you can proceed. With a first time client, with your cane or crop in hand, possibly flicking said bits and pieces, you begin to question your client. A good deal of the questioning is designed to take him through what your normal first session contains.

This, in turn, requires a bit of planning. In many ways, like a good book, a submissive’s time with you heads towards a climax which is the moment when he is least in control of his situation. It might be a through caning or something much lighter where he has to put on his slip and panties and do a bit of lingerie hand washing. It is never a bad idea to give him some corner time with his nose pressed against the panties he’ll be washing. Nor should light rope bondage be dismissed.

Setting him some tasks to perform and be evaluated on is useful. If he is to be whipped – and almost every client will need some level of corporal chastisement – it is worthwhile to have him recite his infractions and apologize for his sloppiness. Putting him in a nighty and tucking him into bed with his arms and legs bound will give him a sense of tranquillity. And if you flip down the covers and pull up his nighty before he is paddled right there in bed he’ll be able to relish his powerlessness all the more.
Some men enjoy a good deal of humiliation both physical and verbal. The varieties of odd activities which submissive men enjoy is boundless. From serious cross dressing through to detailing your bathroom with an old toothbrush, each man will have his own peccadilloes.  And a clever domina will find all the things she needs done – house repairs, ironing, folding laundry – and men who will be delighted to do the work and pay her fees if they are allowed to complete the tasks in a good firm girdle and be properly punished for any mistakes.

By starting the session by outlining what’s in store for him, a client is able to signal where his preferences lie. And, of course, you can tell him he has to tell you the absolute truth or else.
Psychologically, a client is usually most satisfied when he sees a clear connection between his behaviour and his treatment. If you let your clients ejaculate at the end of a session, it should always be a reward for bearing their punishments well.

A domina always has a good deal held in reserve but visually available to her client. Having a crop, a cane and a paddle doesn’t mean you’ll be using all three in a session; but the client who is cropped will leave wondering what the unused paddle would be like. The same is true of anal toys: they are almost never used in a first session, instead, they are an earned threat to keep your client returning.
For outcalls, the procedure is nearly identical with the exception of the fact that the domina may want to take control at an even earlier stage for her own safety.  A man with his wrists zip tied behind his back poses little threat as you are getting to know him. As well, the domina needs to be a bit more aware of the relative noise levels of a crop, cane and paddle. Paddles are loud.

There is no reason why an escort can’t build a significant business as a domina. But it is important to keep the two businesses distinct from the marketing and client contact perspective. Separate advertising, websites and phone numbers make that easy but a bit of work to set up.

The one thing about the domina business is that the clients, if you hit their sweet spots, are incredibly loyal. Repeat business is a given because there is always something new for the submissive to endure.